On Satire News Bits: Vol. 11

Thought I would try a twist on these satirical offering with hopes of propelling readers over the midweek hump. These are from The Onion, but this time, I selected a word to shift through the The Onion’s archives to see what I could find. Lo’ and beyond, there’s interesting material deep in those vaults.

  • This post’s search theme is Congress.
  • Which is your favorite?
  • Do you have any suggestions for future search themes?

Congress Asks President for Permission to have Congress Outside today

New Puppy Teaches Congress Important Lesson about Responsibility

Congress Threatens to Leave DC Unless New Capitol is Built

Congress Awards Itself Congressional Medal of Honor

Congress Votes Itself More Scotch

Congress Hires Drummer

Congress Accidentally Approves Arts Funding

Congress Relieved to Admit It’s not Going to Accomplish Anything This Year

Congress Sets Sail in Search of Fabled Sword of Bipartisanship

President Asks Congress for $30 Billion to Help Fight War on Criticism

Stuffed-Up Congress Allocates $250 Million to Destroy Pollen

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37 thoughts on “On Satire News Bits: Vol. 11

  1. Hi,
    Not knowing Congress at all, I’m going to apply these questions to our Senate here in Australia. :D

    “Congress Asks President for Permission to have Congress Outside today”
    You never know this may work and some ideas may actually be thought of. :D

    “Congress Awards Itself Congressional Medal of Honor”
    Oh yes this fits perfectly, they like to give themselves a pat on the back. :)

    “Congress Votes Itself More Scotch”
    This could possibly apply to all political party’s world wide. :lol:

    “Congress Relieved to Admit It’s not Going to Accomplish Anything This Year”
    Why should this year be any different to any other years. :D

    And that is how It looks in Australian politics, (my own personal opinion anyway) :)

    • Mags,
      Brilliant! I wonder how many of these are applicable worldwide when substituting the name of other governing bodies throughout the world. I wouldn’t be surprised if the answer is many. Thanks for sharing!

    • Ginger,
      If I would have only thought about making that part of the original post. Then again, lesson learned on my part. Glad you enjoyed this and thanks for commenting.

  2. Good morning Frank…and thanks for the smile!

    I’ll go with the popular “Congress Accidentally Approves Arts Funding”. It’s hilarious, and the only thing more hilarious would be….“Congress Accidentally Approves Education Funding”

  3. I love the references to the childishness of the Congress:

    Congress Asks President for Permission to have Congress Outside today

    New Puppy Teaches Congress Important Lesson about Responsibility

    I wonder what a search for “puppy” or “puppies” would reveal?

    • Twixt,
      After all, Congress does give satire writers plenty of material from which to work. :) Glad you enjoyed these and thanks for the future suggestion. Puppies are so adorable though, I would have to make sure to not select the morbid ones. Thanks for commenting.

  4. Lots to chuckle over here. except this one, “Congress Sets Sail in Search of Fabled Sword of Bipartisanship”. For satire to work, it needs to approximate reality, sadly there seem to be few in Congress interested in finding the Fabled Sword of Bipartisanship.

    The mental image of Speaker Boehner playing with a puppy- too funny.

    • Guapo,
      I must admit that I didn’t check the entire archives at The Onion, but if I would have seen that one, I would have selected it because it is right up my alley. Thanks for visiting.

    • Randel,
      Unfortunately, we won’t see that one because as people give Congress low approval ratings, they re-elect their own representatives. In other words, everyone but mine is worthless. Thanks for visiting.

    • Porch,
      A special welcome to a first-time commenter. I post these on Wednesdays – but not every Wednesday and usually not all political satire. My typical Friday post also includes a few selected satirical headlines from the week. Otherwise, the topics here are all over the place. Thanks for visiting and commenting … and I hope you return.

  5. This heading right here “New Puppy Teaches Congress Important Lesson about Responsibility” says so much its not even funny. I love your brutal honesty Frank. Whether I agree or not, I love your honesty

    • Kay,
      I wish I was that creative, thus take credit. I get these from The Onion, a gold mine for satire – which means all I do is pick them. Nonetheless, the New Puppy headline seems to be the overwhelming favorite today! But hey – I am an honest guy. Thanks for visiting.

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