Interesting how things unfold sometimes. My week started with a relative calmness, and now a client wants something by next Tuesday. Oh boy. Guess letting you know that this midweek bite of satire is good timing for me – plus, sadly so, the work is going to cut into my time visiting your blogs.
This dose from The Onion actually is two lists in one. The first five are typical. However, the last five kind of a challenge from a frequent visitor here, Another Day in Paradise. One day she joking wondered if The Onion ever mentioned South Africa. Well, well, well … gotta love the archives as they provided the last five! I sure hope Bulldog also sees these! Any favorites?
Sensitive Scientists Report 5 in 5 Women Don’t Know How Beautiful They Are
Bold Talk about Making Broth Going Around Apartment Complex
Man Who Cried Himself to Sleep Last Night has some Great Ideas for Growing Company Brand
Hiring of Local Moron Gives Nation’s Unemployed Hope
Box of Old Playboys Found
—
South Africa Realizes All Its Things Were Stolen during World Cup
South African Vuvuzela Philharmonic Angered by Soccer Game Breaking Out during Concert
Rhino and Tickbird Stuck in Dead-End Symbiotic Relationship
Oprah’s African School Forced to Cut Oprahmatics, 20th Century Oprah History
Somali Pirates Steal Stadium
Oh, my God, the Vuvuzela Philharmonic. Raises my pucker factor to about Force 9 just thinking about it!
Though I think I’d have to support the “5 out of 5″ by the sensitive scientists. I’ve met a bunch of VERY good-looking bloggers out there, and they ALL complain that they aren’t pretty enough. Just remember the great line, delivered by a VERY wise Scottish philosopher and Chief Engineer: “Every woman has her charms, lad. Ye just need to know where to look!” 
)
Good luck with the work. Remember, I’m available for help at popular prices! (Most people seem to like “free”.
John E,
Working in Force 9 was one thing, but the reference to the wit and wisdom from the Scotish philosopher and Chief Engineer is a classic moment. Many thanks for the laugh!
I must be in the right frame of mind tonight – loved them all!
Knock em dead on that project.
Guapo,
Ah yes … one of the critical essentials of blogging success – the reader’s frame of mind! Thanks for the reminder, and for commenting.
onion is giving China quite a heartburn …a local paper there apparently published a 55 page photo spread on a dictator under the headline North Korean leader one of the sexist man alive…..only to know later the article in The Onion which inspired them was actually a satire…ouch
Soma,
Ah yes … the delightful news from China … but of course I like to take some of the credit because of this: http://afrankangle.wordpress.com/category/opinions-in-the-shorts/ Thanks for stopping by.
A stadium???!!!
Java,
The Somali pirates are quite a resourceful lot! Thanks for visiting.
Did they sell it for scrap? Or for building materials?
Mouse,
I think they want it to have a Somali Pirates professional soccer team. Thanks for commenting.
They are really on the ball, then
And if they don’t have a ball, they can steal one.
they must have a goal
Maybe only one … thus steal the other one.
Now that was a tickler from top to bottom. Rhino and tic bird an Oprah was punchy for all the best reasons.
Howl,
Glad that these were able to provide many tickles. … and thanks for stopping by.
Sensitive scientists and Somali pirates are best of quite a good bunch. See you on your return.
kanerva,
Thanks for visiting.
Good picks … but I will still be posting.
I need to revisit your cruise posts and add some comments
So far you’ve shared lovely pictures from every port, can’t wait to see Köpis 
(Finnish slang for Copenhagen!)
I’ve actually linked them together to make it easier to take the journey.
.. .and I hope to post Copenhagen tonight!
South African Vuvuzela Philharmonic Angered by Soccer Game Breaking Out during Concert–very clever! I hope your project goes well…and almost every day I have a thought about how my job interferes with good quality blogging time!
Debra,
Just a short-term rush … but it still interferes for the good stuff! Thanks for visiting.
South African Vuvuzela Philharmonic Angered by Soccer Game Breaking Out during Concert…. now that one is one of the best I’ve seen… love it to bits…
South Africa Realizes All Its Things Were Stolen during World Cup.. second in line… great post today my friend … great post…
Bulldog,
Glad I you found fun in the salute! Thanks for stopping by.
wishing you success in your work for the client.
Shimon,
Many thanks … and thanks for taking the time to comment.
That is actually good news, Frank! Get down to work and I hope you have fun with it too! All my best and thank you for the good laughs – love all!
Marina,
Thanks for reminding me of the plus side … and for commenting.
I’m busy too. My work at the moment is giving me 12 hour days. I’d much rather be blogging! I hope you get through all you have to do xx
Spiced,
12-hour days are no fun …. nada, zilch, zero, nothing, … Good luck with yours because mine will be over in the first half of next week. Thanks for commenting.
Good Luck for your work, dear Frank, have a nice day, Thanks and Love, nia
Nia,
Thank you for the best wishes. Just wanted everyone to know where I am if they don’t see me. Thanks for stopping by.
The one about the Vuvuzelas tops the list and it led me to explore some other interesting South African websites.
Tim,
Given your appreciation for South Africa and the fact that you have visited that wonderland, glad I as able to renew your thoughts and memories. Thanks for stopping by.
Love Soma the best.
What? Work getting in the way? I am surprised at you, Frank.
Here’s this week’s fav: Hiring of Local Moron Gives Nation’s Unemployed Hope. The GOP must be relieved.
Elyse,
Just one of the crunch times … but I’ll still be posting! Glad you enjoyed the hope for the unemployed. Thanks for stopping by.
I’m partial to the first one. Oh, yes. Doubt and insecurity is a headline for me. But “Oprahmatics”! Perfect.
SDS,
“Oprahmatics” is a classic! … and thanks for sharing your fav and for stopping by.
“South Africa Realizes All Its Things Were Stolen during World Cup.” This rings true. Anything that can be stolen in SA, will be stolen.
Gotta love those “Sensitive scientists.”
Good luck with the order, Frank. Have a great week.
Paradise,
Do you remember making that statement? Thanks for the inspiring this … and for sharing your favorites.
Absolutely, and I stand by it. I was just reading a news letter from our local homeowners’ assoc. saying that there have been three incidents of assault and robbery in the past week. Things aren’t getting any better.
Lousy news.
What a bummer, work interfering with blogging!
Re the Onions, good selection generally, but although I like Sensitive Scientists, Bold Talk Broth and Hiring Local Moron, I think my favs are from the African section, namely
Rhino and Tickbird Stuck in Dead-End Symbiotic Relationship
and
Somali Pirates Steal Stadium.
PS: It’s no coincidence that work is a four letter word.
Fasab,
Well said on several fronts. Good choices on the favorites and thanks for sharing your thoughts.
I love news about Oprah.
Doggy,
Interestingly, the school actually called math Oprahmatics! Thanks for stopping by.
Moron for me Frank
because of nostalgic adventures in my early teens, the box of playboys wins for me. will never forget finding one at about 11-years old, cutting pictures out and keeping them in my pockets for when nobody was around, folding them up in a rush as my father was returning to the car from the supermarket, and then wanting to die when he said, “hey, what’s that?” and then later that day, wanting to die again as he told the story to a house full of people at a thanksgiving-style family dinner.
Rich,
A classic tale probably applicable to many. Thanks for sharing.
BTW … hope you saw AK reporting from lottery sales this morning!
did not see her. spent the night at the beach house, where i don’t have cable tv because i don’t want people to visit and stare at the boob tube. got back home just in time for brooke in bright red.
about the gas card and the 10.9. so is that like an exxon visa or something where you build up rewards? i’ve checked out most rewards cars, and they all seem to give about the same monetary reward, and the only real difference is how you apply it. for example, my southwest visa gives enough rewards for about two free round-trip flights a year. meanwhile, my disney visa gives about $500 credit to spend at disney, which is great IF you go to disney every year, which i do. my discover card gives less than that, but it’s in cash. so i usually lean on the disney card.
Ours is a BP Visa. Earn savings at the gas pump on a per gallon basis (limit to 20 gal). Last weekend they had a special of doubling the rewards, but paying a minimum of 10.9 cents/gal. We had enough to have 30-40 cents/gal carryover. A good savings for us.
Meanwhile, I won’t torture you with this mornings details.
anything about AK cannot be torture.
Today would have been.
in a good way? bad outfit? or torturous in a wanton way?
Torture.
dammit!
Just get that annoying work done. (without going too crazy…save that for here!)
No kidding …. thanks for the push!