On Satire Bits: Vol. 95

In the words of Fat Albert, “Hey, Hey, Hey … It’s Hump Day!”

Hope your week is off to a good start. I just returned from golf league, where I had my steady game tonight – so it’s always good to score well.

Reminder, that the next post is Act 4, Life: The Musical featuring song titles that include young, youth, kids, child, or children. Curtain time is Wednesday, 9:30 pm (Eastern, US) … so get your songs ready.

Below is your mid-week dose of satire courtesy of The Onion. As always, those desiring a challenge can develop a new headline by using the words in the headlines below. My “combo’ is at the end.

Enjoy and have a good rest of the week.

Nation’s limo drivers spend magical prom night playing scratch-off lottery tickets in parking lot

Activists release horrifying video showing how meat products are eaten

Poll finds only 83% of New Yorkers visit Statue of Liberty every day

Food Network star realizes police immediately look for body in giant pile of mashed potatoes

Small business still manages to mistreat workers like large corporate chain

Fan on jumbotron waits until last second to wave

Take-out bag feels light

Mom packs encouraging note in own lunch

Unemployed man vows to get up early, finish watching movie

Carlos Santana surprises wife with coupon for free 45-minute guitar solo

My Combo: For magical night, Carlos Santana vows guitar solo on jumbotron to wife for encouraging unemployed small man to spend night in giant pile of take-out mash potatoes

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53 thoughts on “On Satire Bits: Vol. 95

  1. Pink piggy penny for your thoughts, priceless.

    Here it is now a nickel for your thoughts. The Penny is but a memory, a spirit in the after world; sitting along side 45’s, eight tracks and Atari.

      • Back in the land of the living… still trying to touch sides with all that has to be done… had a very successful “Talking Turf” where we had our software package… lots of interest and call backs for individual demos…

  2. What a combo, Frank. I’m going on a similar [!] approach:
    Police encouraging activists to mistreat workers watching 45-minute Santana guitar solo for free meat coupon. :-)
    Happy Wednesday!

  3. A couple of combos came to mind today :)

    Poll finds 83% of Nation’s Unemployed playing scratch-off lottery tickets

    Activists release giant pile of mashed potatoes in parking lot of large corporate business; police immediately look for man with Take-out bag

  4. I think I packed my own encouraging note to self more than once Frank! ;-)
    I hope you enjoyed your round of golf.. :-) I am getting into my swing weeding :-) Wishing you a wonderful rest of Wednesday Frank.
    Sue xox

      • We did… And its great when you play really well… Nothing beats that feeling of potting a great shot…
        I remember playing a round of golf with hubby once on a short 9 hole golf course we used mainly for practice

        We were on a 3 par hole… And hubby sank it a hole in One.. if I had not been there to witness it, I would never have believed him had he come home and said it had got a hole in one.. LOL… It just bounced and rolled straight in..
        :-D… So yes, its a great feeling! Frank… xxx

  5. He he he, I am not very good at this, but just wondering who expects New Yorkers to visit the Statue of Liberty everyday!! :-D I want to be a pollster.

  6. I’m late to stop by, but always love the Onion. “Food Network star realizes police immediately look for body in giant pile of mashed potatoes.” This was so ridiculous I loved it! :-)

  7. I used to love watching Fat Albert back in the day!
    Glad that you got to go out & have some fun on the golf course.

    My fave: Mom packs encouraging note in own lunch
    My combo: Activists release horrifying video showing fan on jumbotron.

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