On Satire Bits: Vol. 100

Welcome to the 100th edition of Satire Bits. Nothing special, just the same old drivel.

Hope your week has gone well so far.

  • My eye vision is the same, and I’m waiting for the call to schedule my next test (and I don’t understand the delay)
  • Even with the eye problem, my golf game has been good.
  • Life: The Musical – Act 6 is the next post featuring songs with teen(s), teenager(s), teenage, or a specific teen year in the song title – Curtain time is Wednesday, 9:30 pm (US Eastern)

For your mid-week dose of satire, I dived into the depths of The Onion archives looking for treasures regarding the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) – a federal agency is responsible for “protecting  the public health” regarding food products, cosmetics, and medical drugs, vaccines, and medical devices. I’ve even included some with a caption below the appropriate image (all from The Onion). Any favorites? Do you have an ideas on topics for future Satire Bits? Have a good rest of the week.

FDA prepares nation for switch to digital food format

FDA approves prescription placebo

FDA reports half of Americans believe in medical conspiracy theories

FDA reports half of Americans believe in medical conspiracy theories

 

FDA and Dr. OZ clash over apple juice

FDA: Lucky Charms no longer a complete breakfast

FDA deems new drug as safe as anything can be in this crazy world

FDA official states, “Just eat the damn vegetable”

FDA official states, “Just eat the damn vegetable”

 

FDA deems human clones safe for consumption by other human clones

FDA order recall of all panther meat just to see if anyone eats panther

FDA cancels bacon recall after finding US population already at it all

FDA approves salmonella

FDA approves salmonella

 

FDA recalls all food except grapes

FDA okays every drug pending approval, takes rest of the year off

FDA call concrete breast implants “structurally sound”

FDA approves prescription placebo

FDA approves prescription placebo

 

FDA reports new sleeping pill causes dramatic weight gain and missing cats

FDA approves depressant drug for the annoyingly cheerful

FDA approves new drug for treatment of social anxiety

FDA approves new drug for treatment of social anxiety

 

 Except for the opening images, all images are from The Onion.

About these ads

55 thoughts on “On Satire Bits: Vol. 100

  1. Congrats! I wait and then appreciate this “same old drivel” every week. Keep it coming! i love the FDA focus. The FDA & Dr. Oz headline is apt as a current event. Does The Onion have their version of wisdom on education and/or child rearing?

  2. FDA order recall of all panther meat just to see if anyone eats panther–I DO love the way the minds of Onion writers work! 100th Edition of Satire Bits is quite the accomplishment. And I think you should be congratulated that with eye issues you are still enjoying a good golf game. I do hope you get an appointment soon. And I’ll see you tomorrow night! :-)

    • Debra,
      Many thanks for the kind words. Scheduling the eye appointment seems odd to me, thus I may have to make a phone call today. As for the eyes with golf, my vision is good enough because much of golf dealing with longer distances. On the other hand, vision is more difficult when playing pool. Looking forward to your song!

    • Catherine,
      Adjusting my golf game has been interesting. The first week back I struggled, but I think it was because I was forcing my swing in order to adjust … but since then, I’ve controlled my swing and have good results. Meanwhile, I want the next test … but scheduling it seems to be an unnecessary hassle. Thanks for the congrats.

  3. But you are special dear Frank :) Congratulations… I am one of your fan. Wishing you more and more on blogging life and also wishing to be solved your eye problem soon. Thank you, love, nia

    • Archon,
      Alive and kickin’ at this end. From when I started packing (in Feb) for the move, and since the move, my visits are been limited … so thanks for checking in on me!

  4. Congrats on your 100th, Frank. You really don’t look it. :) “The annoyingly cheerful” do sometimes need to be suppressed rather than depressed. I’m now wondering if I want to come back to Florida, if grapes are all I’ll be able to eat. :(

  5. Is it OK for me to make up my own FDA headline? It being easier to get forgiveness than permission, here’s this:

    FDA declares unprocessed food unsafe until biology is better understood.

  6. Congratulations, my dear friend! Here’s to the next 100, and the next …and the next!!! :-)
    I was about to pick: “FDA okays every drug pending approval, takes rest of the year off”, when I read this one: “FDA approves depressant drug for the annoyingly cheerful”!!!! :-) :lol:
    I suppose ‘FDAs all over the world are quite similar!

    • Marina,
      Many thanks and glad you found something that caused a chuckle. Yep … I figure many countries have an equivalent to the US FDA ,,, thus everyone can relate.

  7. Brilliant job, Frank – you’re so wonderful mad too .. it helps. Sorry, to read about your sight problem – hope that it will be dealt with quickly.

      • So sorry to read that you still drag with the problem. The sight, is the sense I wouldn’t like to lose if I have choice.
        Wish you good luck with the new tests and keep me posted, please.

        • Many thanks for the best wishes … On Thursday I had a 90 minute visit with the inside of the MRI tube, so I hope it shows a brain without problems and an explanation of the eye issue.

        • I spent 90 minutes in the MRI tube, but I don’t know results yet … meet with the retina specialist this coming Friday. Many thanks for the positive vibes.

Comment with respect.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s