On Satire Bits: Vol. 101

How’s your week going? We in the US have a national holiday approaching (July 4th), so it’s a short work week for many. Any exciting plans ahead?

Hot and muggy summer weather has a grip on Cincinnati. It’s getting ready to storm, thus my Thursday, the weather is supposed to be fantastic! … so I hope your weather is good.

Last Sunday we drove to Indianapolis (a little over 2 hours) for a ballroom dance event. The venue, the Indiana Roof Ballroom, is quite unique, so I invite you to see the Google images search here. It’s an indoor venue that appears to be on a rooftop at night … and the dance floor is round!

The first half of golf season is over, and I think my partner and I finished in the middle of the pack. Blah … but thanks to my strong play the past 3 weeks, hooray to me for winning one of the individual honors.

In late week’s centennial edition of Satire Bits, I received several suggestions for theme-oriented collections of satire. I searched depths of The Onion’s archives about child rearing and parents. (Thank you Patty @ Learn More Everyday) … Have a good rest of the week. Any favorites?

Proud parents watch as baby form first brand loyalties

New parents desperately seeking other new parents for socializing

Nails, hair cared for better than child

Report: 47% of satellites currently monitoring celebrity parenting

Tiger Woods putts baby into diaper

Mariana Trench once again named worst place to raise children

Smug, new mom going to start blog

Parents urge son to invest in improv comedy education

Area woman says, “Now there’s a stranger who could use some of my child-rearing advice”

Baby put on phone told parents hate her

6-year old stares down bottomless abyss of formal schooling

Increasing number of parents opting to have children school-homed

Man raised by parents struggling to adjust to human society

Parents urged to suck infant’s pacifier to prevent allergies

Area boy states, “I have earned the right to not call shotgun”

Study: Men with small gonads are better dads

Parents at graduation celebrate child’s last accomplishment

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59 thoughts on “On Satire Bits: Vol. 101

  1. Congrats on your individual golf honors! Love the Onion quotes, as usual. I am torn on a favorite. One option is the woman giving a stranger parenting advice–they are everywhere! But the other–although I laughed–might be too on-point for some poor kids who are “school-homed.” Thanks as usual for a fun mid-week break.

    • Bulldog,
      I was hoping you would see the Tiger one as it also caught my eye. … Meanwhile, I’ve been on a streak of hitting the ball well … now wondering how long it will last. As we know, it comes and goes.

  2. Hey! Just got this WP notice, aFA, that you are now “following” me. But I thought you were. Already. Following. Me.
    Does this mean my coffee is cold and you are now re-heating it? Just tell me please my place at your table is still there…
    R.

    • Jots,
      Good Morning …. I’ve been having notification issues, so I unfollowed then followed with hopes of jump-starting my email notification. Is all well out there?

      • Remember Fantasy Island….”De Plane! De Plane!”?
        Change to: “De House! De House!” Just moved from my condo last week into a house…did the opposite of what you and Mrs. did. Painting interior. What fun…NOT! Did I miss prognosis re: your eye? R.

  3. We just finished celebrating Canada Day on July 1st. It was a busy weekend for us, outside chores. The pool is now filled and at last check, the temperature was 77F. The tent is also up, so I slept outside last night. This week will, crossing my fingers, be good.

  4. A few of these made me chuckle. How do they come up with these? The “school-homed” phrase makes me wonder if the headlines are actually edited!

  5. Hi Frank, glad your Summer is going well, and middle of the road Blah is still better than pulling up the rear!.. Keep those steps light my friend, and Keeeeeeep Dancing!… :-)
    Take care.. Sue

  6. “Report: 47% of satellites currently monitoring celebrity parenting.” OUCH!

    “Man raised by parents struggling to adjust to human society.” OUCH AGAIN!!

  7. that’s such a cute baby . . . hopefully not the one who did this: “Baby put on phone told parents hate her” :P
    wow, driving over two hours to dance. that’s dedication. right on, Frank! :)

    • Sun,
      Glad you enjoyed the baby pic as I had to find one with the right look I was going for. In terms of the dance, we had heard about the venue, thus wanted to see it … (our friends had been there) … I would a nice promotional video of the venue, which I will include on a future Monday or Friday post.

  8. Sounds like a fun trip to ballroom dance. Any videos?
    Congrats on your golf honors! :)

    Fave: 6-year old stares down bottomless abyss of formal schooling
    (Not to mention the college bill that comes after. I hear that’s bottomless too.)

  9. There is simply no improving upon perfection, all of the satire the are too good and I got nothing.

    The ballroom, I love that place and I want to go there. How cool is that place in real life. I am betting the pictures do not do it justice.

    Congrats on your individual recognition in golf. I have to ask Frank, how is your eye?

  10. Looks like our respective summer fixes- Reds and Yanks- are playing for next year at this point. But I’m STILL not ready to let football in. I want my summer, or as much of it as I can get…..

    • Cayman,
      How can a team sweep the Giants followed by getting swept by the Padres? … Oh … good teams don’t do that. Big series here with the Brewers this weekend, so we shall see if the ship gets back on course.

  11. Love the song and the video!
    I think now that all that really matters is love, peace & understanding more than I can comprehend.
    I also believe that America should have the best FOURTH OF JULY ever!
    Love and peace to you & yours, Frank. Happy July 4!!!! :-)

    • Resa,
      I’ve always liked the song, and the video is outstanding! We had a wonderful 4th … and festivities will continue today! Thanks for the vibes or love and peace, :)

  12. “Area woman says, “Now there’s a stranger who could use some of my child-rearing advice.” It has a ring of truth. :-) I hope you’re doing well, Frank, and getting the medical tests you need. Sorry about the golf, but given all that’s been going on, middle of the pack doesn’t sound so bad to me!

    • Debra,
      In a league with handicaps, results aren’t predictable … after all, the handicaps are meant to be equalizers. Crazy as it seems, I’ve been playing some of my best golf of the year the past 3 weeks … prompting some to hope that my problems would go away in order for my scores to go up.

  13. Pingback: On Satire Bits: Vol. 102 | A Frank Angle

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