Opinions in the Shorts: Vol. 235

On Politics
With a third of the US Senate up for re-election,there is a consistency that makes me chuckle. Republicans are linking their Democratic opponents to President Obama. That means elect me to a 6-year term because the President Obama has 2 years remaining.

Earlier this week I saw my first TV ad for Senator Mitch McConnell (R-KY) in which he didn’t mention President Obama.

Despite the fact that Congress has lower approval rating than President Obama, the majority of the incumbents will win re-election.

This Week’s Headlines from The Onion
Olympic swimmer Phelps banned from having any contact with water for 6 months
Man wishes there wasn’t so much blank room on anniversary card
Local oaf not sure which part of counter to place order
Documentary viewer can’t wait to find out which 4 lads from Liverpool changed music forever
Serial killer makes an impassioned case for protecting local marsh
Nation’s cuckolded husbands gear up for first day of hunting season with wives’ lovers

The Onion’s list of must-watch fall TV shows includes Lamp Wars, Dance Baboons, and Pumpkin Patch Pickers.

Interesting Reads
Creationism’s disjointed science
An interview with Mikahil Gorbachev
Hummingbird madness
Improve wasting time
Herbert Hoover and the Colorado River

On Potpourri
A tip of the cap to the New England Patriots for generosity. During a commercial break, the team showed a video of Leah Still, the young daughter of a player on the opposing team with a rate cancer. Following the video, the crowd cheered, the Patriot cheerleaders were Still’s #75, and the Patriot owner donated $25,000 to Cincinnati Children’s Hospital. Interestingly, the Cincinnati Bengals can’t keep up on stocking #75 jerseys as 100% of sales go to a Cincinnati Children’s Hospital and pediatric cancer care and research. Yes … like many, Devon Still (the player and father) shed tears on the sidelines.

Speaking of Cincinnati, I’ve set our DVR as Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives on Food Network features my city in a new episode. Check your listings, but the first airing of the “One Street Wonders” episode is Friday night at 10 pm (Eastern US). Here’s a link to the episode schedule at Food Network.

I really like the Delta Airline commercial titled No Bag Left Behind. For those who haven’t seen it, click here.

Leaves are starting to turn, then make their way to the ground; which means this will be my year (since 1987) when I’m not on a twice-a-week 6-to-8-week mission of dealing with fallen leaves. … so NO … I’m not going to miss that!

I had a great view to watch Wednesday morning’s lunar eclipse. But after the moon was completely in the shadow, it ducked behind a tree.

I’ll have another attempt for Life: The Musical next week … well, as long as I remember to announce the acceptable words on Monday for the Play theme.

Hey hey hey … a Saturday Morning Cartoon post will be there for your Saturday.

Your weekend celebrations

  • (Fri) Handbag Day, Egg Day, Mental Health Day, Emergency Nurses Day, Newspaper Carrier, Porridge Day, Homeless Day, Angel Food Cake Day
  • (Sat) Coming Out Day, Costume Swap Day, Family Bowling Day, Southern Food Heritage Day, Music Day, Food Truck Day, Sausage Pizza Day, It’s My Party Day, You Go Girl Day
  • (Sun) Frustration Scream Day, Scream & Shout Day, Day of the Six Billion, Clergy Appreciation Day, Free Thought Day

To send you into the weekend, here’s a classic hit. Interestingly, it was part of an LP released in 1972 on the Wooden Nickel record label. Oh, of course, it must be Lady by Styx. Have a safe weekend and in the words of Garrison Keillor, Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

On Satire Bits: Vol. 109

I don’t know about you, but this week hasn’t gone as planned … not even close. Oh well, it happens. I initially planned the next act of Life: The Musical, but I didn’t provide the criteria on Monday. Once again, it happens – so I’ll push that into next week with hopes of remembering on Monday. That’s just an example of my blog life, but the first two days have been a bit more hectic than I planned. Oh well, it happens.

Enough of my week, how’s yours going so far?

On to your dose of mid-week satire to provide some humor to propel you toward the weekend. Below are headlines from The Onion. Is there one that you find the most humorous? For those wanting more of a challenge, try forming your own original headline with the words in the headlines below the pic. My combo is at the end. Have a good rest of the week.

New Toyota “Driver Easy Speak” feature helps parents yell at children in back of car

Guy in front of you ordering for entire construction crew

Grandpa looking absolutely precious in new baseball cap

Nation’s gratuitously sexual couples announce plans to wait in line at amusement park

Doctors say average heart attack victim doesn’t clutch at chest nearly dramatically enough

Area man somewhat disturbed to think perfect woman for him out there somewhere

Study finds college still more worthwhile than spending 4 years chained to radiator

Open-minded man willing to look past Jennifer Lawrence’s flaws

New study finds running 20 minutes each day could add years of soreness to life

Man hates being in position to think, feel, and act

My Combo: Jennifer Lawrence find 20 minutes to think, feel, and act like grandpa

On Elevating Monday

Time for the weekend report … how was yours?

Whew … what a different weekend for me. The weather change delivered a dose of the cool and windy side of fall. My wife went out-of-town for a gathering of a group of high school friends, but hey … I kept busy with time on the ballroom, some things in the house, a college football game, and hosting the blog party.

A big thank you to everyone attending my blog celebration for post #1500. Your presence and kind comments warmed my heart … and I especially appreciate knowing that some of you visited other blogs. I estimate another milestone sometime in the next two months, but it will only be noted … after all, hosting a blog party is a lot of work! But, I’m now behind on visiting others. :(

Celebrations for Your Week

  • (Week) Walk Your Dog Week, No Salt Week, Fall Astronomy Week, Space Week, Fire Prevention Week, Great Books Week, Mental Illness Awareness Week, Mystery Series Week, Carry a Tune Week, Work from Home Week, Nuclear Medicine Week, Children’s Week, Drive Safely to Work Week, Financial Planning Week, Kids’ Goal-Setting Week, Metric Week, Physicians Assistants Week, Spining & Weaving Week, Dairy Expo Week, Newspaper Week, Get Organized Week, Customer Service Week, Skin Care Week, Teller Appreciation Week, Pickled Peppers Week, Wegener’s Granulomatosis Awareness Week
  • (Mon) Mad Hatter Day, Ivy Day, Smile Day (again), Noodle Day, Come & Take It Day, Diversity Day, Bullying Prevention Day, World Habitat Day, Techie’s Day, German-American Day, Ecological Debt Day, Child Health Day
  • (Tues) Frappe Day, You Matter to Me Day
  • (Wed) Fluffernutter Day (YES! – Remember this one?), Pierogy Day (Awesome!), Emergency Nurses Day, Top Spinning Day, Bring Your Teddy Bear to Work/School Day, Stop Violence Everywhere Day, Touch Tag Day, Octopus Day, Walk to School Day, Pet Obesity Awareness Day
  • (Thurs) Dessert Day, Fire Prevention Day, Chess Day, Depression Screen Day, World Sight Day

To send you into the week, here’s a flash from the past. Thanks to Elyse for reminding me about this one about voice recognition. Have a good rest of the week.

On Celebrating 1500

1500Celebration

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening wherever you are. From the New World to the Old World, from all the continents, welcome to my 1500th post … and this post is about celebrating the occasion!

For the entire weekend, please take the time to comment, state where you are from, say something about your blog, interact with my guests here and on my sidebar, listen to music, and enjoy the food and beverages. Entertainment will appear throughout the celebration, so comeback often … and bring a friend!

By the way, the theme for the next act of Life: The Musical will be Play - so I will give more information on the next Monday Morning Entertainment. After all, Play is good to follow Act 9’s Work.

Some Factoids about 1500
Only 14 players have ever played 1,500 games in the National Hockey League (NHL)

We could discuss the year 1500 AD, but other than the year starting on a Wednesday, I don’t think many of my readers would be interested in the Second Battle of Lepanto

On the other hand, the Polynesians settled Fiji in 1500 BC … and many of my readers would love to take an all-expense paid trip to Fiji

Many radio stations occupy 1500 on the AM dial

1500 meters is a common event in Olympic swimming, speed skating, running, and walking

1500 Ocean is a restaurant at the wonderful Hotel del Coronado in San Diego, CA

Some say fifteen hundred, but other say one thousand five hundred

1500 equivalent to 15 centuries, but all but one of the 1500s was in the 16th century

1500 is a grand and a half but 1500 dollars, 1500 Euros, 1500 Pesos, 1500 Pounds, 1500 Krona, 1500 Rubles, 1500 Yen, and 1500 Turkish Lira are not equal … but they are exchangeable into another currencies.

1500 Broadway is at Times Square in New York City

Besides being an Australian film, 1500 Steps refers to the number of ice steps on the Chilkoot Pass (Alaska) and the number of steps on a portion of the Inca Trail leading to Machu Picchu

On a 24-hour time system, 1500 is 3:00 PM

Songs to start the party

Opinions in the Shorts: Vol. 234

On Politics
Congress failure to have a vote before leaving for the campaign trail regarding ISIS/ISIL is another example that members of Congress act with the party and personal interest first. After all, the majority of the House of Representatives skirt their responsibility while wanting to sue the President regarding use of executive powers. Vote them all out!

Did anyone see the Charlie Wilson’s War (the movie with Tom Hanks)? Discussions about arming and assisting the Syrian rebels reminds me of that movie.

A friend of mine told me that he heard a political commentator say that the reason nothing can get done in Washington is because there are too many people who are socially liberal but fiscally conservative clogging the streets. That’s a load of crap because there are very few in Congress who think that way. In other words, we are not a scapegoat!

An interesting interactive: US Presidents and their approval ratings

On This Week’s Headlines from The Onion
Man always taking good mood out on friends
Grasshopper dismembered by future Supreme Court Justice
Man having great time will soon have to apologize to everyone
Tense party enters third hour of unplayed acoustic guitar leaning against the wall
Man worried antidepressants will leave trace of original personality
Study finds mass extinction could free up billions of dollars in conservation funding by 2024

The Onion’s list of highlight from George Clooney’s wedding

Interesting Reads
Science is not democratic
Brookings’ on why government fails 
Mutual funds’ five-star curse
Bacteria may be telling you what to eat
Teaching is not a business
Insurance companies tracking your driving

On Potpourri
This past week was simply one of those limiting my time visiting blogs. :(

I heard this story that sounds right from The Onion (but isn’t) … It seems a reality show will determine the crew for a privately funded trip to Mars.

Blog party right here this weekend, so sure hope you stop by. Celebration starts at 12:15 am (Eastern US), so Europe, the party will be ready for your morning, and lunch time in the Lands Down Under.

No Saturday Morning Cartoon post is weekend because of the party of pre-empting normal scheduling.

Your weekend celebrations

  • (Fri) Smile Day, Denim Day, Diversity Day, Borderline Personality Disorder Day, Caramel Custard Day, Techies Day, Butterflies & Hummingbirds Day
  • (Sat) Cephalopod Day, Balloons Around-the-World Day, Blessing of the Pets Day, Frugal Fun Day, Improve Your Office Day, Taco Day, Ship-in-a-Bottle Day, Cinnamon Roll Day, Golf Lovers Day, Vodka Day, Toot-Your-Own-Horn Day, Animal Day, Ten-Four Day, Card-Making Day
  • (Sun) Bathtub Party Day, Change a Light Day, Country Inn Bed & Breakfast Day, Blessing of the Fishing Fleet Day, No Prostitution Day, Apple Betty Day, Smile Day, Do Something Nice Day, Depression Screening Day

To send you into the weekend, here’s a mild song to enjoy – it’s the Doobie Brothers with Black Water. Hope to see you at this weekend’s party, plus have a safe weekend and in the words of Garrison Keillor, Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

On October 2014

All things on earth point home in old October: sailors to sea, travelers to walls and fences, hunters to field and hollow and the long voice of the hounds, the lover to the love he has forsaken. (Thomas Wolfe)

October, the tenth month, but it was the eighth month in the old Roman calendar – after all, octo- means eight

For we in the northern hemisphere, October is about autumn, but to those south of the equator, they are enjoying the emergence of spring

In leap years, no month starts on the same day of the week as October, but during common years, only January does

October ends the same day of the week as February every year, but only January does in common years

October’s moon is known as the Hunter’s Moon

Flower: Calendula, Birthstone: Opal, and the Zodiac signs: Libra (until October 22) & Scorpio (October 23 and beyond)

There is no season when such pleasant and sunny spots may be lighted on, and produce so pleasant an effect on the feelings, as now in October. (Nathaniel Hawthorne)

Sometime in October, all the four major professional sports leagues in North America are playing

Slavs call it “yellow month” because of the colors of leaves, but the Anglo-Saxons refer to October as “Winterfylleth” because at winter begins with this full moon … yet the Germanic use “Wein-mond” for wine month

Neil Gaiman wrote a story personifying the month in his collection Fragile Things entitled October in the Chair

Some movies with October in the title: October Sky, Hunt for Red October,
The October Man, First Monday in October, The Hunt for Red October, Mr. October, October Sky, and October

Oh, Marilla,” she exclaimed one Saturday morning, coming dancing in with her arms full of gorgeous boughs, “I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers. It would be terrible if we just skipped from September to November, wouldn’t it? Look at these maple branches. Don’t they give you a thrill–several thrills? (L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables)

October is the month to increase awareness for AIDS, Antidepression Death, Blindness, Breast Cancer, Caffeine Addiction Recovery, Domestic Violence, Down Syndrome, Emotional Intelligence, Dyslexia, Eye Injury Prevention, Fair Trade, Global Diversity, Audiology, Chiropractic Health, Critical Illness, Cyber Security, Disabilities Employment, Depression Education, Ergonomics, Liver, Orthodontic Health, Spina Bifida, Substance Abuse, Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, Work & Family, Rett Syndrome, Workplace Politics, Menopause, and Squirrels

October is the month to celebrate American Cheese, Pharmacists, Apples, Children Magazines, Church Libraries, Class Reunions, Country Music, Eat Better – Eat Together, LGBT History, Free Thought, Books, Bake & Decorate, Arts & Humanity, Medical Libraries, Right Brainers, Spinach Lovers, Cosmetology, Photographers, and Stamp Collecting

October is the month to promote Adopt a Dog, Black Speculative Fiction, Bully Prevention, Bilingual Children, Church Safety & Security, Co-op Awareness, Energy Management for Families, Halloween Safety, Health Literacy, Home Eye Safety, Strategic Planning, Walking to School, Intergenerations, Long-Term Care Planning, Animal Safety & Protection, Crime Prevention, Dental Hygiene, Family Sexuality Education, Kitchen & Baths, Hearing Protection, Gourmet Adventures, Car Care, Tackling Hunger, Window Covering Safety, Organizing Your Medical Info, Self Promotion, Reading Groups, and Toilet Tank Repair

October is the month to appreciate bats, caramel, chili, cookbooks, field trips, popcorn, pork, roller skating, seafood, pizza, sausage, pretzels, desserts, apples, pickled peppers, tomatoes, cookies, and pasta

October is the month to Embrace Positive Attitude, Vegetarians, Family History, Hispanic heritage, German-American heritage, Polish-American heritage, and Italian-American heritage (yea me – Do any of these apply to you?)

October is nature’s funeral month. Nature glories in death more than in life. The month of departure is more beautiful than the month of coming – October than May. Every green thin loves to die in bright colors. (Henry Ward Beecher)

On Satire Bits: Vol. 108

Depending when you read this, it’s either the last of September or the beginning of October – nonetheless, I say Hello October!

Being a new month you may have been expecting my toast to October,  but come on now … interrupt your mid-week dose of satire? But never fear, the October post is next.

My golf league is official over. It was a bit sad for me because today was our last night ever because the course that I’ve played for over 20 years is closing. Good news is that my partner and I are Second Half Champions, plus I think I also won an individual honor. Considering that my wife won her league, we are the House of Champions!

Reminder to all that I have a blog party on the docket for this weekend. The post will go live sometime after midnight Saturday (Eastern US) for the European morning, the Aussies and Kiwis lunch, and everyone else in between or earlier. I only host these when the occasion warrants, so hopefully my regulars will not only drop by, but hey … your friends are welcome.

Because it’s Astronomy Week, I dived into the deep, dark bowels of The Onion’s archives to find astronomy-related satire. Any favorites among these? For those wanting the combo challenge, make your own headline from the words in the headlines below. My Combo is at the end. Have a good rest of the week.

Astronomers discover massive asteroid that could wipe out life on Earth, force Nordstrom out of business

Astronomers admit making up Neptune

NASA to send Earth into space

Astronomer discovers black hole at center of own marriage

Intelligent, condescending life found in distant galaxy

Study finds Earth located in lamest part of universe

Mean scientists dash hopes for life on Mars

Astronomers say Earth’s overpopulated crisis will soon be solved by heroic meteor

Chicken-shit asteroid veers away at last minute

Extraterrestrial nerds contact Earth

Hubble Kaleidoscope finds evidence of space looking all crazy (Image below)

My Combo: Extraterrestrial discovers condescending life on Earth 

Image from The Onion

Image from The Onion