On Baseball Randys

Since1972 Randy has been a very good friend and we’ve talked a lot of sports. He’s a legend in his own mind and an unquestionable sports homer; but he’s still a friend. His baseball knowledge is best demonstrated by proclaiming Omar Vizquel would have a 40-HR season before retiring.

Since he mocked my selection of All-Time Franks, he challenged me to do an All-Time Randy team. The poor guy hasn’t yet learned to be careful what you ask for – especially when it comes to me.

Being that I’m generally more than one step ahead of him, I already knew that Cooperstown must wait for the Big Unit to become its first Randy; plus a mere handful of Randys have been All Stars (AS).

Like Randy, the lefties dominate the pitching staff. Unlike Randy, these guys could also field the position. Like Randy, they will work hard and not contend. Unlike Randy, they won’t know much about accounting. Nonetheless, I’m confident they will beat the all-time teams of Ruperts, Camerons, and guys named Sue.

Ladies and Gentlemen, now entering taking the field under the Big Top, the All-Time Randys!

1B Randy Milligan
2B Randy Velarde
SS Randy Ready
3B Randy Jackson (AS)
Randy Hundley (AS)
OF Randy Winn (AS)
OF Randy Bush
OF Randy Moore
DH Randy Knorr

SP Randy Johnson (AS)
SP Randy Jones (AS)
SP Randy Gumpert (AS)
SP Randy Wolf (AS)
SP Randy O’Neal

RP Randy Myers (AS)
RP Randy Moffitt
RP Randy St. Claire

Mgr. Randi Kaye

Honorable Mention: Randall Simon with his claim-to-fame of being the one who assaulted of the Milwaukee sausages during the sausage race … and it was even the one of my heritage – the Italian Sausage.