On Satire News Bits: Vol. 13

With yesterday’s post about lung cancer being a bit on the heavy side of life, maybe you are like me and need a bit of satire to lighten your mood – or possibly even change your mood to the better. With this post I reach back into past headlines from The Onion with hopes that there will be at least one that will tickle your fancy. Do you have a favorite?

Chardonnay Vomited into NPR Tote

World Bank Forecloses on World Farm

Trail of Rose Petals Leads Wife to Sink Full of Dishes

Yard Sales Reeks of Divorce

Cost of Living Now Outweighs Benefits

Cute Couple on Same Antidepressant

Loft Apartments Converted Back to Mayonnaise Factory

Getting Randomly Picked to Make Half-Court Shot Now Best Way to Make a Living

Meth Addicts Demand Government Address Nation’s Growing Spider Menace

Nation Unsure What to do with Information that Golfer Padraig Harrington Wears Citizen Watches

Red Lobster Offers New Top-Hat-Full-of-Shrimp to Attract Wealthier Customers

National Endowment of the Arts Funds Construction of $1.3 Billion Poem