On Satire News Bits: Vol. 16

I golfed Tuesday evening, and a round with no rhythm, poor execution, and even worse decision making adds up to one of my worst rounds – therefore – I need a laugh! So let’s go for a midweek chuckle courtesy of The Onion. Any favorites?

Earlobe Now Stretched Long Enough to Hang Self With

Area Moms Freaks Out Again for No Apparent Reason

Hopes and Dreams Crushed by Panel of D-List Celebrities

Desperate Small Town Erects World’s Largest Fiberglass Chili Dog

New Homeowner Suddenly Fascinated by Molding

Headlights Caught in Deer

Cool Cat Sitters Lets Cats Stay Up All Night

Alien World to Help Out Syria Since This One Refuses Too

91 Year Old an Expert at Outliving

Undergraduate Student Under Graduate Student

Americans Spend 90% of Waking Hours Starring at Glowing Rectangles

Microbrewer Trying to Work Dog into Name of New Seasonal Beer