On Satire Bits: Vol. 28

Getting back into my normal routine hasn’t been easy since returning from vacation. At least I’ve finally completed my rounds of visiting. Hopefully I haven’t forgotten anyone.

After 3 weeks away from golf league and seeing our lead drastically shrink, I had a strong return yesterday and the team did well too.  Meanwhile, I have been teasing with announcements regarding a celebration here on Saturday – which can spill into Sunday. Well – here is the scoop – Saturday will be post #1000! So, I invite you and all your friends for a visit. The more the merrier, so tell your friends to visit and comment.

A toast to GingerFightBack for saying he missed my headlines from The Onion. Without any further delay, here’s some midweek satire. Any favorites?

Last Male Heir Watches Movie Alone on Laptop

Chicago Cubs Combine Seven Players to form One Giant Player called “Chicagozor”

Reporters Struggle to Maintain Energy until Election

CSI Set to Perform at Next Super Bowl Halftime Show

“Player to be Named Later” in 1992 Trade Finally Named

Putin Learn Putin Behind Plot to Assassinate Putin

Local Women would have Baked Blueberry Muffins I Jury was Sequestered

Severe Allergic Reaction Causes Florida to Swell Up Twice Normal Size

Former Spy Telescopes Turn to Space

Mismatched Tupperware Lids not a Problem after Devastating House Fire

Physicists Discover Our Universe is Fictional Setting of Cop Show called “Hard Case”

Executive Quits Fast Track to Spend More Time with Possessions