On Satire Bits: Vol. 41

Happy New Year!

We rung in 2013 from a ballroom dance event, and then attended a brunch party the next day. Hopefully your holiday was a safe one! How did you spend New Years’ Eve?

To start the work week, a dose of satire from The Onion is a good idea. Besides identifying your favorite, here’s the challenge – develop a new headline by combining 2 or more from those below. Enjoy!

Defeated Man Victorious

Extensive FAQ Page Dispels Any Lingering Confusion about Popular Boston Duck Tour

Anorexic Woman at Gym Looking Good

Area Man Impresses Date by Eating Calamari Appetizer as Fast as Possible

Intern Just Happens to be Beautiful 22-year old Woman

Second-Person Narrative Enthralling You

Area Man never in the Mood to do Things He Hasn’t Done Before

Man Stays Up Most of Night Rocking Cat Back to Sleep

Pan Left to Soak Now Predates All Current Roommates

Area Woman Finally Uploads all 12 Million of her Vacations Photos to Facebook