With my project out of the way and tax information in the hands of an accountant, now its on to a variety of tidbits of things to do.
Seems like it’s a long time since the last bit of mid-week satire. Even though I wasn’t posting tidbits from The Onion midweek or in Friday’s Opinions in the Shorts, I was still gathering headlines from my favorite satire source.
I have more than normal because most of these have something to do with relatively recent news. Enjoy. Which is/are you favorite(s)?
North Korea returns to normalcy with synchronize disco jump-rope gala
Disappointed couple on 8-month waiting list to get married at the Pentagon
Girls Gone Wild Bankruptcy forces thousands of wet, wild party girls into tough job market
Chicago man bushes mound of snow from beef sandwich before eating it
Poll: 99% of human beings prefer big, slippery hound dog pope
Transportation Secretary hoarding traffic cones and stop signs before the sequester
Iran promises to end nuclear program in exchange for detailed diagram of atomic bomb
Les Miserables wins Oscar for most sound
Obama and Congress must reach deal by March 15, and then by April 11, and then by April 20th, and then by May 1st
Bus transporting Carnival cruise passengers crashes into sewage treatment plant
Hung-over Energy Secretary wakes up next to solar panel
I-95 diagnosed with highway cancer
Ben Affleck nominated for best friend of Matt Damon
Dead iPod remembered as expensive
College freshman roommate has had excuses to go home every weekend since August
Millions of human beings experiencing emotions about JJ Abrams directing Star Wars
Rod Stewart passes for elderly aunt