Happy Mid-week. As last weekend fades away, the light of next week is getting closer.
The first part of the week brought Cincinnati good weather, but we are expecting rain Tuesday night into Wednesday morning followed by cooler temperatures. Oh well … that’s spring.
Unlike last week, our first night for golf league went rain free. Given the first full round of the year, I was happy the way I played.
Alright now – on to the mid-week dose of satire. Which is your favorite? For those wanting the extra challenge, use the information in only these headlines to form your own satirical combination. Mine is at the end of the list.
If you need more satire, Cayman (a visitor here) did his own version of headlines in this recent post. Tell him I sent you.
Have a good rest of the week!
Loyal driveway patiently waiting for wonder to return from work
Man trapped in art museum says, “Art imitates life, life imitates art”
Burger King Twitter hack forces followers to survive without constant stream of BK information
Seagull with diarrhea barely makes it to crowded beach in time
Man not sure he’s dynamic enough to work at local marketing firm
UN aid workers distributing food to malnourished KFC customers
Proud species commits suicide rather than being driven to extinction by humans
Middle-aged banana panics upon finding brown spot
240 killed in stampede after bucketful of Oscars dumped on stage
Johnny Depp now completely made of scarves and bracelets
Picture at party comes out great
Woman rushed into cosmetic surgery with 8 glaring flaws
My Combo: Woman commits suicide after rushing Johnny Depp with diarrhea
A Frank Angle 
Haha–I can’t beat yours. That’s great!
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Carrie,
Glad you enjoyed that one.
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Picture of man trapped in Burger King with middle-aged woman rushed aid upon finding brown spot.
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Renee,
Ha ha … meanwhile, being trapped in Burger King is one thing, but this reason would incite panic.
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I’m not going to go with a combo this time. I wouldn’t want to shock you again. So I’ll just go with this one: “Seagull with diarrhea barely makes it to crowded beach in time.”
And, I’ll share a fun fact to know and tell — birds do not have large intestines which is why they poop so much. Some bloggers have no large intestines either, but they manage to not decorate the furniture.
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Elyse,
Seagull is the big winner this week … Meanwhile, about birds … who would have thunk it … and I always thought it was about efficiency to keep their weight down.
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a 3 way tie and they are next to each other:UN, proud species and middle aged banana.LOL
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Erin,
Good to know that my arrangement served as a trifecta for you.
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wow, the first time i ever hit a trifecta.so long ago, i forgot if that is dog race or hockey?
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LOL … take your pick … trifecta at the track or hat trick at the game.
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LOL.. thank-you now i remember…i confused hat trick..
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That’s ok … you helped make a good story.
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Your headline outdid anything I could have thought of!
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Guapo,
I know better than that.
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Combine Oscars, Depp, and cosmetic surgery to pretty much describe Life in the Flash Lane. 😉
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Archon,
That would do it!
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Johnny Depp now completely made of scarves and bracelets and picture at party comes out great…
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Cathy,
Johnny Depp is easy to target on this one. 🙂
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My dear friend, I have nominated yu for The Versatile Blogger Award! Congratulations! Please visit this link for the rules:transcendingbordersblog.wordpress.com/2013/04/24/the-versatile-blogger-award-3/
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Tazein,
Many thanks … I hope to do an awards post in a few weeks.
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A fine crop Frank – the seagull pips it for me
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GFB,
Of course, some think birds have constant diarrhea. 😉
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Seagull with diarrhea barely makes it to crowded beach in time–hard to beat this one.
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TBM,
Let’s hope you don’t encounter any of those seagulls on your trip.
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Man at party with diarrhea panics upon finding brown spot.
Let’s face it, diarrhea makes everything funny. ^^
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Ryan,
LOL … good one. I was just wondering why I didn’t try to connect diarrhea and brown spot! Thanks for coming through.
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If there’s a poop joke to be made, I’ll dump it. 😉
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After all, there is a run on diarrhea jokes.
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Seagull with diarrhea forces followers to survive without constant stream of BK information
I simply could not help myself!
Glad your first full round of golf was up to par 😉
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Val,
That’s it …. the seagull delivering answers for anyone who gets diarrhea from eating at BK!
Yep – the golf round was surprisingly steady – thus unexpected early in the season – but I also know that it can come and go very quickly.
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Glaring KFC customer delivers a bucketful of seagulls to proud UN workers
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John,
LOL … I wonder if the customer knew what was actually in the bucket!
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If only I had 8 glaring flaws. I need a plastic surgeon prepared to take on a much bigger task than that xx
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Spiced,
Thanks for a humorous look at yourself.
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Hahaha. For me the seagull story wins hands down. 😆
Johnny Depp with diarrhea, panics upon finding brown spot. (Sorry, Johnny.) 🙂
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Paradise,
Well … you choices say it all! 🙂
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Seagull with diarrhea barely makes it to crowded beach on time! Love it! Gave me my first laugh of the day. Can’t do much better than that.
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SDS,
Knowing that you are a few hours behind me, glad to know that this started your day with a good chuckle.
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Good morning Frank! I have to go with Johnny Depp, cus it actually made me laugh…and, yes, out loud!
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Good Morning Alex …. and YES …. success this morning!
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How about:
upon finding brown spot at party in art museum Proud Middle-aged Man panics waiting for bucketful of diarrhea to stream
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Fasab,
Holy Crap Toiletman! Nothing like a steady stream of diarrhea jokes … and no Jonny Depp this time. 😉
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Seagulls … sound like typical day at the beach in UK *smile. Glad you made to the middle of the week safely. *smile
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Viveka,
The seagulls have delivered the undisputed winner in this set!
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Always love my dose of mid-week satire! And here’s my dose of mid-week creativity:
“Middle-aged man trapped in Burger King panics, wonders how to survive without bucketful of KFC”
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Twixt,
Whoa … trapped in BK and desiring KFC may require lifetime psychological treatment!
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Can’t beat the Seagull! I’ll stick to that!
Happy mid week, Frank!
🙂
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Marina,
And I’m sure there are no seagulls in Greece. 😉
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This title, ‘Burger King Twitter hack forces followers to survive without constant stream of BK information’, is absolutely scarcastic and wonderfully funny. You always put me in a good mood when I read your post Frank 🙂
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Kay,
I assume that also means that BK must sent their share of tweets. … Nonetheless, I’m glad the mid-week satire meets hits your happy mood button.
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Yes. Yes. The Seagull! To write anything would detract from that.
(We have lots of them here – even in the Target parking lot. Incoming!)
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“Man trapped at Burger King commits suicide in stampede distributing food.” Best I’ve got late in the evening. LOL!
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Debra,
On no … the person has no shame for that act at BK!
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