On Satire Bits: Vol. 53

It’s mid-week and I just came off a lousy round on the golf course. On the plus side, the weather and the company were wonderful.

How’s your first part of your week going? Hopefully, this boost of satire will send you toward the weekend with positive vibes. Any favorites?

For those wanting the extra challenge, use the information in these headlines (and only these headlines) to form your new combination headline. Have a good rest of the week.

Company lacks manpower to complete latest round of layoffs

Area man panics after “liking” 381 of his ex-girlfriend’s Facebook photos

Website humiliates itself

Talk of crackers makes local thirsty

Report: Chinese third-graders falling behind US high school students in science and math

Inspirational teacher cancelled out by every other teacher at school

Retired pope vows to continue drawing “Papalpuss” comic strip

Community mourns death of beloved drunk driver

Danica Patrick flood with fan mail from nation’s inspired girl

Nostalgic warden has seen 3 generations of family come through the prison

Obnoxious friend won’t stop attaining major life milestones

Child who just lost balloon begins lifelong battle with depression

My Combo: Retired Pope vows to talk crackers with Danica Patrick

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39 thoughts on “On Satire Bits: Vol. 53

  1. Sorry about your bad round of golf on Tuesday, but it can’t be as bad as the 107 I shot last Thursday on an area course from hell that I beg you never to play! For me though, the golf only topped off a bummer week that I’m only now starting to recover from. Details later.

    You hit the Mother Load with your Satire Bits: Vol. 53!! Hard to choose a favorite from so many zingers, but for me it’s between: “Company lacks manpower to complete latest round of layoffs” and “Report: Chinese third-graders falling behind US high school students in science and math.”

    Like

  2. These are the most hilarious ones I’ve seen in a while – Company layoffs could be nearly true in some cases. And the Chinese third graders besting our high school students – SAD but possibly true!

    Like

  3. “Area man panics after retired pope vows to talk crackers to obnoxious friend.” Aha! My first headline! I’m so proud I may vow to talk crackers to the retired pope…where is he, anyway? Hmmmm…..

    Like

    • Rogue,
      Cheers to your first combo headline! Woo hoo!!!!

      To answer your question, I believe he is still at Castello Gandolfo waiting to move to an apartment on the Vatican grounds.

      Like

  4. Best bag of Onions for a long time. Very hard to pick a fav. Have to make do with these instead 🙂

    Obnoxious pope humiliates 3 generations of Chinese family with flood of photos from Facebook

    Nostalgic Retired teacher mourns death science and math in high school

    Like

  5. I’m going to take the high road here, Frank: “Inspirational teacher comforts child who just lost balloon…as a result, she decides to attain major life milestones.” I like rewriting history!

    Like

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