Greetings everyone! Hope all is going well for each of you.
My week hiatus is progressing, although I haven’t visited others as much as I hoped. Then again, my break isn’t over yet!
Since our last communication, we’ve made it to the dance floor, attended a euchre party, hosted friends, moved 10 cubic yards of mulch (that’s 7.6 cubic meters elsewhere in the world), played lousy golf, and a few other odds and ends.
Although this isn’t a normal week, I could use a dose of satire for my mid-week boost. For your entertainment, I went to The Onion’s archives in search of headlines about North Korea. Any favorites?
Enjoy – and have a good rest of the week.
“What we are doing is weird and wrong” says small voice in Kim Jung Un’s head
Kim Jong-Un announces plans to bring moon to North Korea
North Korea nukes self in desperate plea for attention
Kim Jong-Un interprets sunrise as act of war
North Korea returns to normalcy after synchronized jump-rope gala
Kim Jong-Un unfolds into giant robot
North Korea celebrates as Kim Jong-Un first man to walk on moon
Teen Newsweek reports North Korea is The Bomb
President sends Secretary of State to North Korea to do that condescending nod thing
North Korea tests short-range missiles on family and friends first
On Politics
I discovered that all but one of Oklahoma’s representatives and senators voted against relief for victims of Hurricane Sandy. Because of the recent tornado, keep your eye on them. Interestingly, the one rep that supported the relief is from the district taking the biggest hit this week.
Do you remember the cranky criticizing UN Ambassador Susan Rice? Well, the disclosed emails regarding Benghazi seem to be vindicating her.
Because important problems remain, I like the headlines of this Charlie Cook column: Republicans Hatred of Obama Blinds Them to the Public’s Disinterest in Scandals.
Earlier this week, I asked a question that Congressional committees focusing on the IRS scandal, so here is another one. Whereas the Supreme Court’s Citizens United ruling opened the door to financial contributions to campaigns, did it protect the fact that such a vehicle be through a 501(C)(4) tax-exempt organization?
This week we saw the dark side of humanity through the horror of the senseless attack of the British soldier.
On This Week’s Headlines from The Onion
90% of audience at college graduation involved in heated family argument
Nation supposes it is outraged by White House scandals
Burundi Beef Council announces, “Please send beef”
YouTube to air first hour-drama: Turtle has Sex with Shoes
Everyone forgets to bring swimsuits to coworker’s party
Study: Anxiety resolved by thinking about it real hard
Extra! Extra! Read all about it! The Onion secured this picture of Duchess Kate Middleton with morning sickness.
On Potpourri
To my American readers, we have a three-day holiday weekend, don’t forget to remember Monday’s intent.
Congratulations to Kellie Pickler and Derek Hough for winning the latest Dancing with the Stars (DWTS). I know cast selection involves luck, thus this season’s cast was a bit weak (in terms of dancing). However, Kellie and Zendaya were awesome …. and how could anyone not enjoy Jacoby Jones!
Overall, I continue to believe that part of DWTS success is that it is a throwback to variety shows of the past.
The rash of followers continues, but it surely is not translating into increasing reads and comments. For someone who has blogged as long as I have, my stats are, at best, mediocre. On the other side, thank you to my regulars.
I’m taking a break after this post, which means another Saturday morning without a cartoon post. I know – that’s three in a row. Nonetheless, I plan on using the break to 1) finish some in-progress posts, 2) focus on visiting other blogs, and 3) doing some daytime activities with my wife during her time off. Besides, maybe I will at least sneak in some satire to charge my week.
I’ll send you into the weekend with two videos. The first is a commercial that I couldn’t take my eyes away. The second is a tribute to the US Armed Forces, fitting for our Memorial Day weekend. Personally, I like this tribute from 2008, as it also reminds me of a wonderful maestro who is no longer with us.
Have a good weekend! In the words of Garrison Keillor, Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.
The following past post marked the occasion of our 36th wedding anniversary. Given that I also enjoy saluting numbers, here’s my toast to 36.
In Mathematics
Divisible by 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 12, 18, 36
Is a perfect square (of ±6), a triangular number, a square triangular number, a 13-gonal number, a highly composite number, a semiperfect number, a Harshad number, an Erdős–Woods number, the sum of a twin price, and the sum of 1-cubed + 2-cubed + 3-cubed
The degrees of the interior angle of a regular pentagram
The number of possible outcomes when rolling two dice
Number of sides on the truncated cube and the truncated octahedron
36 squared is 1296
The sum of integers 1 to 36 = 666
In Chemistry
Atomic number of Krypton, whose neutrally charged atom has 36 protons and 36 electrons
In Space
Messier object M36 is in the constellation Auriga
New General Catalogue (NGC) object 36 is a spiral galaxy in the constellation Pisces
36 Cancri is an A-class star in the constellation Cancer.
Discoverer 36, also known as Corona 9029, was an American optical reconnaissance satellite launched in 1961\
Soyuz 36 spaceflight was in 1980
Expedition 36 to the International Space Station is scheduled to begin in May 2013
In Standards
In the US (and very few other countries) 36 inches = 1 yard
IBM System/36, a minicomputer
Refers to a 36 inches long pipe wrench
In the UK, a standard beer barrel is 36 UK gallons, about 163.7 liters
Many early computers featured a 36-bit word length
ASCII code for the symbol ‘$
The number of characters required to store the display name of a UUID or GUID (e.g., 00000000-0000-0000-C000-000000000046)
IBM System/36 (S36) was a minicomputer marketed from 1983-2000
36-bit computer architecture
In temperatures, 36 C = 96.8 F, but 36 F = 2.2 C
In Music
36 is a punk band
36th Grammy Awards were in 1994 with Whitney Houston as the big winner
36D is a song written by Paul Heaton and Dave Rotheray and performed by The Beautiful South.
6-C is an album by Fifth Column
Mozart wrote Symphony #36 in 1783
Berlin 36 is a 2009 German film about a Jewish athlete in the 1936 Olympics
In Art
36 Views of Mount Fuji
36 Views of the Eiffel Tower
In Literature
Thirty-Six Stratagems is a collection of Chinese proverbs
The 36th Chamber of Shaolin (1978) is a kung fu film
36 is a movie (2010) directed by Martin Campbell
36th Academy Awards held in 1964 with Best Picture nominations to Cleopatra, How the West Was Won, Lillies in the Field, America America, and Tom Jones (winner)
36 Pasos (36 Steps) is a 2006 Argentine horror film
North of 36 is a 1924 silent film Western Drama
In Entertainment
Watch Channel 36 in Charlotte, Lexington (KY), Oakland
Canal 36 is a television station in Honduras
The Incubator was the 36th episode of M.A.S.H, which aired December 1, 1973
36 is a sports documentary show on NBC Sports Network and TSN
The 36th season of Saturday Night Live was 2010-2011
The game of roulette has ’36’ numbers on the playing grid and roulette wheel
Rollorpoker, a roulette-based game, uses ‘36’ playing cards on the wheel and playing grid, instead of numbers
In Language
Thirty six, trente six, dreißig sechs, kolmekymmentä kuusi, tretti seks, talatin da shida, XXXVI
In Sports
Retired jerseys of MLB’s Robin Roberts (Phillies) and Gaylord Perry (Giants), NFL’s Mack Lee Hill (Chiefs), and NBA’s Lloyd Neal (Trailblazers)
The Adelaide 36ers are an Australian Pro-Basketball team
In NASCAR, #36 has raced 633, never won, finished in the top 5 32 times, and driven the most by Ken Schrader (106)
Super Bowl XXXVI: New England Patriots 20 – St. Louis Rams 17, played at the Louisiana Superdome on February 3, 2002
In Religion
In the Jewish tradition, light created by God on the first day of creation shone for 36 hours
The Torah commands love, respect, and protect the strange 36 times
There are 36 righteous people in every generation
36 candles are in a menorah over 8 days
In the Māori legend, 36 gods were involve creating the first human before receving the breath of life from Tāne
In Shavism, 36 tattvas describe the internal aspects of creation
The 36th US Congress (1859-1861) during the last two years of James Buchanan’s presidency
Alexander Hamilton wrote Federalist Papers 36, The Same Subject Continued: Concerning the General Power of Taxation, the last of the seven papers on taxation
In World History Year 36 BC
Buddhist calendar year 509, Korean calendar year 2298, Thai solar calendar year 508, Chinese calendar year 2601/2661 to 2602/2662
Mark Antony married Cleopatra VII while still married to Octavia
In World History Year 36 CE
A leap year that started on a Saturday
Bengali calendar year -577, Berber calendar 986, and Iranian calendar year 586 BP – 585 BP
Historical figures include Pontius Pilot, Emporer Tiberius, and Herod Antipus
Some say this is the year of Jesus’ crucifixion
In Geography
The 36th parallel south only across land in Australia, New Zealand, Chile, and Argentina
The 36th meridian east passes through Russia, Ukraine, Turkey, Syria, Lebanon, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, Sudan, Ethiopia, Kenya, Tanzania, and Mozambique
US Route 36 runs 1,414 miles from Rocky Mountain National Park, Colorado to Uhrichsville, Ohio
In Business
The Thirty-Six Bisto in Anchorage, Alaska
Thirty-Six, a camera boutique in Singapore
Thirty-Six Peonies Publishing Company
Studio Thirty-Six – spa, beauty, and personal treatment in Santa Rosa, California
Miscellaneous
A perfect score on the ACT
In French-speaking countries, 36 is often used as a placeholder number
International phone code for Hungary
The 36 pounder long gun was the largest piece of naval artillery for French war ships in its time
TI-36 calculator made in 1986
The 36 Boys were a gang of primarily Turkish immigrants from Berlin-Kreuzberg involved in criminal activities
The 36-line Bible, the second printed edition of the Bible and known as the “Bamberg Bible”, is named after its 36 lines of text on each page. FYI: The Gutenberg Bible had 42 lines per page
As storms pounded the central US this week, I recall this conversation with a long-time friend. He lives near Oklahoma City, so he deals with his share of tornadoes. I asked him if he ever gets used to them, and he strongly replied, “Never!”
I’ve had a busy week doing some needed things around the house. I a run-around as trying to fix my weed whacker is taking too much time. Toss in mediocre golf and only being able to visit a few bloggers, YUK!
In other words, I need a midweek dose of satire to energize the rest of the week. Which is your favorite? For those desiring to try your own combo, use the information for the headlines below (and only that information) to make a new headline. My combo is at the end.
Have a good rest of the week!
Freezing coatless woman has decided it is spring
Physicists confirm they have found and killed the God Particle
Amputee inspires others not to lose limbs
Jessica Simpson goes on tour to promote the novel she read
Mom hasn’t ordered favorite pizza topping in over a decade
Stars of cancelled show terrified fans will raise money for movie
Website’s new layout feels like deepest betrayal
Old refrigerator unable to control when it releases water
South Carolina defends right to fly Hardee’s flag from state capitol
Man wishes computer could do thing it already can do
Course sponge excited to join Smith family dishwashing team
Report: Saxophone still an OK vehicle for self-expression
My Combo: Jessica Simpson inspires fans by finding God Particle in Saxophone
The alternate domination of one faction over another, sharpened by the spirit of revenge natural to party dissention, which in different ages and countries has perpetrated the most horrid enormities, is itself a frightful despotism. But this leads at length to a more formal and permanent despotism. The disorders & miseries, which result, gradually incline the minds of men to seek security & repose in the absolute power of an Individual: and sooner or later the chief of some prevailing faction more able or more fortunate than his competitors, turns this disposition to the purposes of his own elevation, on the ruins of Public Liberty.” — George Washington, September 19, 1796, Farewell Address
As we watch the current uproar regarding the event of Benghazi, sadly and shamefully, this is the way Washington works. Regardless who occupies the White House, regardless who controls Congress, our elected officials are primarily about spin – spin to protect an ideology, advancing a political point of view, and setting the course for the next election. With spin favoring manipulating facts, or even worse, lying, truth and integrity are two of the casualties. With many, if not the majority, of Americans aligning themselves with a preferential political party and relying on biased perspectives, who are the real winners and losers?
The recent IRS news is another example. Congress is jumping into the fray with various committee hearings, which are actually prime opportunities for predictable political grandstanding. Besides taking advantage of diversions to avoid critical issues, the committees probably will not address this key question: Do political groups fit the definition for 501-C4 tax exemption as an organization organized for profit but operated exclusively for the promotion of social welfare.
The answer: Absolutely, because they act in the welfare of most (if not every) elected official in Washington!
FYI: I wrote the above before reading these two good reads: a column by Ruth Marcus and this commentary from Roll Call.