After the cool weekend, the first part of the week has been wonderful weather. It appears one more day is possible before the rain clouds move back into the area – which also means get some yard work done!
The classic video of Lucy and the chocolates on the conveyor belt was a big hit. After others commented on the upcoming chocolate and wine event, I decided to declare this week as Chocolate and Wine Week. If you noticed, yesterday was a wine post.
For your midweek dose of satire, I searched The Onion’s archives for past headlines involving chocolate … and a bonus video. Any favorites?
20 idiots evacuated from Times Square M&M’s store
Half of sleeve of Oreos lost in house fire
More Vegetables evolving chocolate-sauce-filled centers as evolutionary imperative
Local resident like a chocoholic, but for booze
Ozzy Osbourne bites head off five-pound chocolate rabbit
Report: Double-stuffed Oreos could raise tolerance to stuff
Blood thirty, undead ghoul advocates chocolate-cereal consumption
Hershey ordered to pay obese Americans $135 billion
U.N. orders Wonka to submit to chocolate factory inspections
Chocolate pudding futures up $2 per barrel
Praise the Lord … and pass the chocolate
……
Chocolate and Wine Week continues tomorrow. Meanwhile, here’s a special video for chocolate lovers.
I’m goin’ with Ozzie tonight Frank. I must be tired.
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Elyse,
Tired or not, it is very Ozziesque.
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Frank, looks like endorphin heaven to me 🙂 My fav is “More Vegetables evolving chocolate-sauce-filled centers as evolutionary imperative.” Yes!
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Lynn,
That’s mine, too! …. so suggest a chocolate massage for a future birthday gift!
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Too easy to find a winner! It’s about time someone woke up to Wonka and his funny little chocolate factory 🙂
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Kanerva,
Time is running out on Wonka as he has been getting away with too much for years!
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the 20 idiots evacuated from M&M store is incorrect…idiots never travel in even numbers…but still my fave…
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Jots,
Great point …. Maybe the one who counted either counted themselves or forgot to do so.
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Report: Double-stuffed Oreos could raise tolerance to stuff–I know this to be true! Chocolate and Wine week is always a good idea! 🙂
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Debra,
Nothing like personal testimonials for validation!
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I find it hard to imagine a whole barrel of chocolate pudding. 😯 That chocolate massage sounds like a really messy ordeal. Not for me. I’d rather eat the stuff, sugar, calories and all. 😀
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Sylvia,
No problem … so here are some tasty treats for you.
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Yummy……….You really shouldn’t spoil me like this, Frank. People will talk. 😀
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LOL …. glad you enjoyed the treat. FYI: Your ears may be burning because I mention you in tomorrow’s post.
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Going with the M&M store one. Idiots fascinate me.
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TBM,
That works …. and idiots are an interesting hobby because they make themselves known and make the news.
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I simply cannot select one today, they are all delicious. I am searching for Nirvana though I an uncertain I would be able to resist licking myself clean.
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LOL …. Enjoy!
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With the headlines I’m going with ‘Hershey ordered to pay obese Americans $135 billion’, and I’m thinking Hershey is getting off easy with that one, but the absolutely funniest of the morning has to be that video! At the end when they wrapped her up in foil I nearly spewed coffee! Too funny!
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Good Morning Alex,
I know the importance you place on morning coffee, so I’m glad that you encountered a near spew, thus not an actual spew! Meanwhile, Hershey’s probably feels the same you as you.
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There is a spa in Hershey, PA that offers complete chocolate treatments from soaks, to facials, to chocolate martinis. And yes, it is true, the whole town smells like chocolate. They pass it out like calling cards at every corner and there is such a thing as eating so much chocolate that the caffeine keeps you awake. I’m sadly speaking from experience. But it was divine.
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Have never had chocolate massage … but I been chocolate body scrub for a couple of years now .. and it makes the bathroom messy, smells lovely and skin feels like silk afterwards. *smile Ozzy one – my favorite.
As somebody said … I don’t want to fall in love .. I want to fall into chocolate.
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Viveka,
Because of your love for travel and chocolate body scrubs, here’s one for you.
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“Praise the Lord and pass the chocolate!” Sounds about right…
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Kayjai,
… and the flock says Amen!
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Got to go with Ozzy
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Bulldog,
Understandable, Ozzy is a worldly figure.
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I think if I had a house fire, the last thing I would worry about is how many Oreos were lost xx
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Spiced,
Understandable, after all, other chocolate melted.
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I’ll drink to that.
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Hansi,
I’ve got the feeling you’ll drink to anything! 😉 …. By the way, ever have chocolate-infused port?
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Ozzy and I have so much in common….my son has never gotten over finding his chocolate rabbit with one ear bitten off. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww…the scrub…..Ewwwwwwwwwwwww
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Zannyro,
Oh no … you scarred you son for life!!!!! … Meanwhile, OK …. you favor the chocolate massage over chocolate scrub. Meanwhile, start licking your chops for the next post.
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lol!
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Praise the Lord and pass the chocolate….no better headline than this
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LouAnn,
That seems to be the second fav of the day! … Amen!!!
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“Ozzy Osbourne bites head off five-pound chocolate rabbit”—Finally. Something I have in common with Ozzy.
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Carrie,
Yep – who would have ever imagined you sharing even one common trait with Ozzy!
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“20 idiots evacuated from Times Square M&M’s store” – This is too real.
Good gracious lord! I couldn’t have that chocolate over me, I struggle with body lotion.
Not for me!
Have a good day.
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Doggy,
Yep – Times Square bit is too real. Meanwhile, given your struggles with body lotion, the chocolate massage seems to be too much for you. How about the chocolate scrub (video) in the comments? Of course would be good for Miss Peach. 😉
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All brilliant, UN & Wonka a bit more!!!
Have a sweet chocolaty Wednesday, Frank!
🙂
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Marina,
Merry Chocolate to you! …. and just wait until the next tasty post!
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…how much can a person take?!!!
😉
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Well … at least you’ll see it in the morning. 🙂 … but it is unbelievable. Too bad blogs can’t deliver taste.
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Don’t underestimate imagination!!! Can’t wait! Saving my appetite. ..
🙂
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I adored the chocolate massage video – I think the smell would drive me insane with a desire to lick the stuff right off, but the overall thought is heavenly.
I used to own a small business making chocolate truffles and caramels. Out of all the flavors, nothing I made ever beat a sea-salt caramel dipped in dark chocolate.
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Jennie,
Glad you enjoyed the chocolate massage video. Did you see the chocolate scrub video in the comments? Regarding sea-salt and caramel … YES …. I keep avoid the big container at Costco!
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Those Truffles were to die for. Can you fax me a box?
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John,
Consider it done …. Hooray for 3D fax and print machines.
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“Ozzy Osbourne bites head off five-pound chocolate rabbit” this sounds completely true 🙂
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Kay,
LOL … agree … just another trait of good satire. HEY …. I hope you enjoyed the massage. FYI: An awesome treat tomorrow in my celebration of Chocolate and Wine Week.
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To me, the idea of using chocolate for a massage is just a waste of good chocolate. Those first three headlines are my favorites, I can’t choose just one.
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Weebs,
Well know …. you know how you want to use your chocolate! By the way, the next post is right up your alley – and one (I think) I promised you many moons ago.
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Fav Onion? Gotta be the UN one, first time I’ve agreed with anything they’ve done.
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Fasab,
It’s possible that Wonka uses sweat-shop tactics.
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I will behave, and keep my chocolate massage comments to myself! =:O
All the Onion bits are great, but I’m going with the last one…. Hallelujah!
Looks like the clouds are rolling-in on the Smoky Mountains, too, so I may actually get some house work done today.
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Victoria,
LOL …. the last one is popular. Good choice! Storms clouds rolling in must be an interesting sight …. well, as long as the storms aren’t too bad. Good luck today!
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Oh it’s amazing. I enjoy it because it keeps my ego in check. Mother Nature style. And, it does provide impetus to clean and do laundry…. that is, unless I decide to get caught-up with my favourite bloggers. Wishing you a fabulous Thursday!
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I know the feeling … go get ’em!
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You know, I once tried ordering pudding by the barrel. It wasn’t so much that the barrel contents tasted rather greasy, it was the HUGE smile the mechanic down the street wore for a week….. 😉
And can anyone in an M&M store REALLY be called an idiot? 😀
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John,
Your experience with a barrel of pudding is not surprising!
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Those idiots from Times Square M&M store are still milling about the square.
I think they’re plastered to the monitor windows outside ESPN now…
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Guapo,
Thanks for the first-hand observation, which helps getting rid of the hear-say!
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Chocolate….oh, sorry day dreaming of chocolate….oh, sorry..M&M’s…Oreos…don’t wast the chocolate on massages!
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Mouse,
Are you on chocolate overload? 😉 …. NEVER!!!
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i’m going with the idiots in the M&M’s store, but i’m not sure why. it has potential though.
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Rich,
Here ya go … a short story challenge this in 100 words. 😉
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