Greetings everyone! Hope all is going well for each of you.
My week hiatus is progressing, although I haven’t visited others as much as I hoped. Then again, my break isn’t over yet!
Since our last communication, we’ve made it to the dance floor, attended a euchre party, hosted friends, moved 10 cubic yards of mulch (that’s 7.6 cubic meters elsewhere in the world), played lousy golf, and a few other odds and ends.
Although this isn’t a normal week, I could use a dose of satire for my mid-week boost. For your entertainment, I went to The Onion’s archives in search of headlines about North Korea. Any favorites?
Enjoy – and have a good rest of the week.
“What we are doing is weird and wrong” says small voice in Kim Jung Un’s head
Kim Jong-Un announces plans to bring moon to North Korea
North Korea nukes self in desperate plea for attention
Kim Jong-Un interprets sunrise as act of war
North Korea returns to normalcy after synchronized jump-rope gala
Kim Jong-Un unfolds into giant robot
North Korea celebrates as Kim Jong-Un first man to walk on moon
Teen Newsweek reports North Korea is The Bomb
President sends Secretary of State to North Korea to do that condescending nod thing
North Korea tests short-range missiles on family and friends first
Visual Bonus: See storyboards of new Batman movie starring Kim Jong-Un
A Frank Angle 
Euchre?!!!! You must live in either Michigan, Ohio or western PA. Rock on! Used to sell Euchre decks consistently in my northern Michigan game store location, and online to ONLY people in the three places I mentioned. Seriously. It’s a great game and no one plays it anymore.
Did you know it used to be the top card game in gambling halls during the gold rush? Live about 45 minutes from Virginia City (think Bonanza, and Mark Twain) and the old saloons have some antique decks on display.
Loved the Onion headlines. Fave is ‘North Korea tests short-range missiles on family and friends first’ hahahahaha.
As for my headline? Hmmmm how about
‘North Korea Hacks Newest Edition of PhotoShop: Unable to Threaten War Due to Unauthorized Install”
Meh. Could do better. I need some coffee.
Thanks for the grin and have a great evening!
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Rachel,
You got it … I’m in Ohio … and I know euchre is a regional game, but didn’t know its tie to the Wild West. Nonetheless, it’s a fun, fast game. Glad you enjoyed my trip to The Onion’s vault … and thanks for sharing one!
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i do so enjoy the ‘lightness’ of our conversations….like poking our heads over the back garden fence to have a wee chat. Lovely….
PS. i’m w/Rachael….nuking the family and friends….which would cut down on the annual Christmas card list. Indeed!
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Jots,
I guess I’m like Wilson, Tim the Toolman’s neighbor. 🙂
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Actually, the idea of Teen Newsweek got me.
Teen Newsweek Celebrates Jump-Rope Gala.
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Oh Frank, did you read the Onion is closing shop after 25 years. Whatever will we do without them, I am despondent.
Kim Jong Un tests new dance, Moon Walk; Jackson family demands immediate stop for insult to dead ancestors.
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Val, no! Onion closing? Please tell me that’s satire
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Rachel,
See the link from ComposerInTheGarden.
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Onion closing? Why did I not get the memo?? Terrible!
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Fasab,
I am not confirming or denying the report that I did not report.
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Val,
Good one linking KJU and the Jacksons!
Regarding The Onion closing. I can’t confirm the report, but I can say that your report has create quite the stir with readers. What’s your source?
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Gotta go with the scifi ref here Frank: Kim Jong-Un unfolds into giant robot Loved the Batman storyboards – what a hoot!
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Oh, and the Onion is not closing; internet hoax. Read about it here: http://now.msn.com/the-onion-is-not-shutting-down-its-a-cruel-internet-hoax
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whew. was wondering about that when I read Val’s post.
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Thank goodness! The Onion better do a headline on its own demise soon.
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That would be funny 🙂
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Patti,
The question is whether the report is true or not.
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Great! I knew it had to be a hoax. Maybe some devious Kim Jong-Un disinformation campaign. Grrrr
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Thank you Lynn!
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Lynn,
Yippee … someone looked at and enjoyed the storyboards! 🙂
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President sends Secretary of State to North Korea to do that condescending nod thing as Kim Jong-Un unfolds into giant robot…
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Cathy,
Very good! 😀
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I have no idea what euchre is. I feel so sorry for those poor buggars in North Korea, most of whom are starving to death and all because their country is ruled by a complete madman xx
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Spiced,
Euchre is a fun, fast card game. Interestingly, it’s popularity is regional in the US. Here’s a link. http://www.pagat.com/euchre/euchre.html …. Meanwhile, North Korea is a world all to its own.
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Too much N Korea for me, but this one seemed fairly clever: President sends Secretary of State to North Korea to do that condescending nod thing
I’ve never played any euchre either. Some day I’ll look up what that is, but I hope you had fun with it!
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Dave,
The condescending nod is easy to picture. Euchre’s popularity is fairly limited to Ohio and surrounding states … Here’s a link http://www.pagat.com/euchre/euchre.html
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I’ve never heard of a euchre party in my life until this post Frank. I feared it might be something religious, but I looked it up and I’m very relieved that it’s just cards. I rather liked: Kim Jong-Un announces plans to bring moon to North Korea. If my book is included in your 10 cubic yards of mulch, I hope it will serve double duty and make fine compost.
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Lame,
Being that most of your life has been on either coast, you flew over the states where euchre is popular. Send me the three dimensions of your book so I can calculate the number of books required for that much mulch.
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Okay, Science Guy, the pressure’s on: 8 x 5.2 x 0.3 inches
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North Korea nukes self “What we are doing is weird and wrong” says Kim Jung
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Bulldog,
That voice is his head is quite profound.
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Frank, glad you some dancing in over the weekend. You sound like you’re keeping plenty busy. My favorite is “North Korea returns to normalcy after synchronized jump-rope gala.”
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Bumble,
We tend to stay busy doing something! I like the jump-rope gala, too!
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That small voice in Kim’s head, he really should listen to it 😀
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Kanerva,
I’ve got the feeling he would be the only person who could get his attention.
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I know North Korea should be on my mind, but Holy Cow! – Please weigh in ASAP on what this Onion Going Out Of Business stuff is all about so I can continue my day (life)!!!
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Tim,
I am working on the matter at hand.
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Condescending nod for me Frank!
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GFB,
That would be gripping video drama!
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Michael Moore or what!
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The big directors will be fighting over it!
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This week i can’t choose just one. Can I say all of them?
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TBM,
Yes you can .. after all, you did. 😉
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Loved that last one, Frank. Methinks he should stop right there. 😀
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Paradise,
No kidding!
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Hi Frank! I have to say the: “K.J-U interprets sunrise as act of war” …even though i can think of other countries making such interpretations too!!!!
Happy Wednesday and rest of the week, Frank!
🙂
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Marina,
Probably very realistic!
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Thank for this. Enjoyed the laugh
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Thank you for this. (fast fingers)
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John,
That is the intent of mid-week satire. 🙂
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North Korea …. ticking bomb …. or just a play for the galleries????
Enjoy your break – but you have been missing some great … posts my world. *laughter … seen you around.
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Viveka,
Bummer on what I’ve been missing … so that means I have some catch-up to do.
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Enjoy the break…we all need to take one from time to time.
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Hansi,
Many thanks …. and I realize you know the importance of breaks!
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Kim unfolds as giant robot – he really is a transformer…
(That name Kim always brings up a mental picture of some bubbly blond cheer leader in a 60’s beach party movie…eerie?)
Sympathy with your mulching efforts
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Mouse,
Oh no … .KJU in a remake of a 60s film, Beach Blanket Un. Good transformer idea!
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I think my favorite was the first man to walk on the moon bit. Although I think it only could have been bolstered if it went on to say that he then launched a nuke to rid them of the terror that is the selenites from Melies’ “A Trip to the Moon.”
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Peter,
There is much that can be said by that isolated island. Thanks for sharing your favorite.
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Honestly, i can imagine this headline actually happening “Kim Jong-Un interprets sunrise as act of war”. I can totally see this headline lol
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Kay,
Agree as I can see it too!
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What a rollercoaster! Get back in charge Frank, the whole thing’s getting out of control – Onions – No Onions – Yes Onions again – and all we get is a condescending nod from the secretary of state. It can’t go on like this!!!
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Kim Jong-Un interprets sunrise as act of war–they are all great! Sounds like you’re having a good week, despite the lousy golf! Enjoy!!
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Debra,
There is something quite fitting about that headline. Meanwhile, lousy golf is starting to wear on me, which is odd because I generally don’t let the game get to me.
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Is the nodding Secretary still Frau Clinton? I can see her throwing the fear into Little Kim as few others could.
Euchre used to be popular in southern Ontario. We played it with my parents when we visited, and I played it at work. Then it was largely replaced locally by a German game called Solo. Similar, but more complex. Played with high cards down to sevens. 🙂
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Archon,
Frau Clinton stepped down, thus has been replaced by John Kerry. Glad to discover that someone here knows euchre, which makes sense due to our closeness. Thanks for the scoop on Solo, but my first time ever hearing about it.
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Sorry I’m late here, my head’s been suing for divorce – or maybe I should go with, I’m considering amputation as a cure for my headaches? At least there’s only ONE screen in front of me tonight, not 3 or 4 (or 8 or….) 😀
How about “North Korea Nukes Moon During Kim Jong Un moonwalk, making Kim “Da Bomb”.” (I’m sorry, did I say that out loud? 😉 )
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John,
Glad to see that your head is keeping your normal … plus I knew this post was right up your alley.
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BUSY!!! Extremely. Wonderful life!
Loved your satire 🙂 You always have me smile. Love your humour.
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Eyes,
Many thanks for the kind words, but these our courtesy of The Onion – however, I have to identify them!
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There’s nothing like Kim whatisname to make you chortle!
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Rose,
Glad to hear that you are a chortler!
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Okay, I’m going to blame my choice of North Korea (Onion) titles on the fact that it is 12:29 a.m.: “North Korea tests short-range missiles on family and friends first.” Yeah, I better go to bed. Enjoy your time off.
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E-Tom,
The crazy thing about that headline is it seems so real.
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“North Korea nukes self in desperate plea for attention” was life imitating the artless. Which is always kitschy. The Teen Newsweek line got me wondering what a news magazine might read like with Scott Baio as Editor in Chief (You better believe I’m dating myself on that one). As for Kim Jung-Un bringing the moon to North Korea? What do they do for an encore after Rodman lifts his pants up?
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Cayman,
Bummer is I recall when Scott Baio became a star!
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It seems like it was just yesterday when Joanie loved Chachi…..
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Agree
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My dear friend, I have nominated you for the Seed Of Light Award! Congratulations! Please visit this link :transcendingbordersblog.wordpress.com/2013/06/02/the-seed-of-light-award/
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Tazein,
I’m on my way .. thanks.
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So many good ones in there, Frank. The depiction of North Korea’s loss of touch with reality is very clever. Thanks for the laughs.
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Cuttlefish,
Yes, it’s a sad case … at least we find something to laugh at.
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