On Satire Bits: Vol. 63

The weather in America has been a bit on the wacko side, so wherever in the world you are, I hope all is well with your weather.

Today’s golf involves dealing with the steamy weather. Fortunately, it was a fun event for our league, which made it easier to deal with the weather. Unfortunately, we slide the past few weeks, thus ended in 4th place (out of 10).

Anything happen special to you since the weekend?

It’s time for the mid-week dose of satire from The Onion.  Any favorites? For those desiring a challenge, use the headlines below (and only that info) to create your original headline. Mine is at the end of the list.

Study: 80% of waking hours spent plotting revenge

Guy 30 seconds into karaoke better get act together

Strange new culture forming at other end of office

30-year-old factors in birthday money

Google opt-out feature lets users protect privacy by moving to remote village

Couple keeps marriage together for the sake of no one

Man who plays game for millions of dollars called Gutsy

Single woman has Facebook picture with sister

Audience at press conference relieved to hear “Steps will be taken”

Study: Pregnant women can drink one bottle of wine per day if fetus can hold its alcohol

My combo: Guy uses birthday money to keep marriage together by getting picture with bottle of wine at press conference before moving to remote village