It’s mid-week, and as I prepare this post, Cincinnati is in the midst of receiving a dose of ice and snow. Enough! No more! Uncle!
Also at this time is the highly publicize debate at the Creation Museum. Because of the location being in the Cincinnati area, media coverage has been substantial. For the record, although the interchange between science and religion is a high-interest topic of mine, I never considered watching it online.
With Wednesday being Nutella Day, I am considering a Nutella-style Fluffernutter for lunch!
On to your mid-week dose of satire from The Onion to supply energy toward the weekend. As always, those wanting the extra challenge can make new headline by using the information below. Think about using your knowledge about parts of a sentence as nouns, adjectives, and verbs. Thinking who, what, when, where, and why also helps. It’s easy! My combo is at the end. Have a good rest of the week!
Report: Americans lead world in compressing big sandwiches so they are bitable
High school elects 45-year-old Homecoming King
Sea World forces orca to perform nude
Breaking News: Congressman walking somewhere
Shirt a far-cry from medium it once was
Man smoking e-cigarette must be futuristic bounty hunter
Male substitute teacher with ponytail cloaked in mystery
Woman unaware she’s only person on acid at James Taylor concert
Man eats last 75 meals from container or carton
Store manager impressed by new trainee’s ability to ignore customers
My Combo: E-cigarette smoking bounty hunter with ponytail compressing bitable orca sandwich from carton forces unaware futuristic store manager to attend James Taylor concert at Sea World with nude substitute Homecoming king
A Frank Angle 
Sorry, I’m laughing too hard at James Taylor acid dropper to write my own.
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Sweet Baby James. Sigh.
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Elyse,
I was going to give you a tune, but I can’t get to YouTube (for whatever reason).
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Frank, I am totally bummed. I missed the camel:
http://www.arlnow.com/2014/02/05/camel-comes-to-rosslyn-on-hump-day/
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Bummer … but the story is a hoot. Woo Hoo!!!! … How close were you to this?
Meanwhile, he’s something to perk up your day … what I wanted to deliver this morning.
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I work in Roslyn. This happened about 1-1/2 blocks away. Alas, I am still at work and so am really far away from being over the hump!
Thanks for the video! I love that song. And I love JT.
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🙂 … given your current workload, the camel would have been a great treat for you.
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Especially if he spat my clients … (actually they are quite nice. The ones from last month that got me very far behind with this project are the ones who need to be slimed.)
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Then arrange for them to get the camel visit.
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No. They wouldn’t realize I was sending it to spit.
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… so that’s even better.
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Guap,
Knowing that you are an experienced concert goer, this makes sense.
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It’s Nutella day at my house every day. These kids go through a mega container in a matter of a few days.
Your combo has me outta’ breath. Not sure I can come up with one after that one!
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RoSy,
Being that your household are big Nutella fans, has anyone combined it with marshmallow creme? Meanwhile, I was putting the combo together, but it kept building and building!
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I’m with Guap on the James Taylor Headline.
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Man eats last 75 meals from container or carton and realizes that his shirt is a far-cry from medium it once was. See? Who, what, when, where and why? I wasn’t the Editor-in-chief of my highschool newspaper for nothin’!
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Cathy,
Very good, but I saw that guy on Dr. Oz!
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🙂
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You will like Nutella and Fluff. I will open a new jar of Nutella Wednesday. Yippee
45 yr old Orca eats nude man in store.
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Jim,
Thanks for the endorsement as I’m looking forward to the treat for my lunch. Meanwhile, that Orca must be a cousin to Land Shark.
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Your storm, is to be ours in an hour or so. The predication is 20cm of snow, to add insult, it will be pushed along with high winds. Bring it on! I’ve got two fire places in my igloo.
From the onion, hmmm, seems hard to distinguish between fact and satirical with this offering, usually it’s not difficult.
Your combo, has a aroma of gumbo.
Backup to Creation Museum, I wonder if I should it visit. Maybe I could find who the heck responsible for pink bath tubs and pink toilets, Am sure both sides would blame the other -no one will lay claim to that one.
BTW……..to answer your question from the other post regarding the colour of toilet paper. No it is not PINK, rather Dusty Rose.
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Hudson,
Ah ha … a throne room of complete Dusty Rose! … but I doubt if the museum will be able to help you beyond, “It’s God’s work.”
Hope you survived the latest winter blast. Our combination of snow and ice allowed me to walk on top of the snow without sinking. Very difficult to shovel … so I gave up.
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Americans lead world in compressing Congressman big sandwiches forces orca from container to perform on acid.
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Bulldog,
Good one … so here’s a spinoff of yours … actually wishful thinking …. Amercians compressing Congressman into container of acid.
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Man smoking e-cigarette with ponytail forces orca to perform on acid at James Taylor concert. What do you say? I combined four in that one. I think that’s a new record for me! Sunshine out here with blooming trees! Stay warm and cozy. Hey, I know, try some fluffy socks.
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Amy,
See … it’s not hard! 🙂 Well done. Stayed in much of the day, but shoveling was the most difficult of the winter. Very cold tomorrow … YUK! But heck, I’ve got plenty of packing to do inside!!!
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I can see a huge outcry for the Orcas
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GFB,
Readers have been picking on the Orcas, besides … they (the Orcas) have PETA on their side.
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Great playwright too!
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Yes, ice and snow can be very wearing…
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Shimon,
Most of this winter’s snow has been dry, thus very easy to shovel. But the latest snow was wet and coated with a layer of ice … thus no fun to shovel.
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I’m laughing at Hudson’s two fireplaces in his igloo!
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Georgette,
Hudson is quite the character! … but I imagine it’s true … but keep in mind that his bathroom is Dusty Rose.
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I remember trying Nutella years ago, before it hit the market here (my Uncle worked for A & P and used to get samples for us to try), not one of us in the family liked it. I am still surprised it is on store shelves, but everyone has different palettes.
My choice: Americans lead world from medium unaware she’s only person to perform nude with futuristic bounty hunter.
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Catherine,
Nutella is an interesting taste, but like anything, different palates react different ways. Meanwhile, if the police are interrogating that woman that was with the bounty hunter, she may be panicking!
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Say it isn’t so! Orca performs nude?! For shame! By the way, my nephew, who is here living with us, smokes e-cigarettes. Stay warm.
Hugs from Ecuador,
Kathy
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Kathy,
With Orcas performing nude, just another example of “What is the world coming too?” Hi to your nephew!
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“Sea World forces Congressman to perform nude.” Oh, wait, no one would have to force him. He’ll just take to Twitter and post the photos himself.
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Carrie,
Perfect … simply perfect! How much snow did you receive in this latest blast?
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I lost count. It’s still falling. I can’t tell where the white/gray ground ends and the white/gray sky begins. Sigh.
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We only got several inches … BUT … if was very wet … then an ice layer formed, thus allowing me to walk on top of the snow without sinking.
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How courteous of it…
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… and horrible to shovel.
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We’ve got that ice and snow up this way as well! …anyone discussing yet a cross-country pipeline to redistribute all this water out to California? I’m pretty sure it’d be cheaper in the long run….
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Alisha,
California could use any drop they can get! How much snow did your area receive from the latest storm?
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We got about 5 inches yesterday, about 10 on Monday, and expecting more on Sunday. We’re fortunate to live an area with excellent road treatment, but I still can’t help but feel a bit greedy with all this frozen water!
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Whoa! … That’s 15! No thanks!!! So far, the big dumps have avoided us.
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Well, I think you just about covered everything, Frank. Thanks for the giggle. 🙂
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Sylvia,
I guess I did get a little carried away. 😉
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Oh, please please could you send me a Nutella-style Fluffernutter asap?!!!! Your combo can’t be topped. 🙂 My humble contribution: Congressman to perform nude for futuristic bounty hunter on acid.
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Marina,
The Nutella-style Fluffernutter successfully delivered a smile! Meanwhile, then the Congressman tweets a pic!
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Hope you’re doing ok there Frank….this is getting ridiculous isn’t it??? NO MORE SNOW!!!
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Suzanne,
It’s been a tough winter, but tougher for you. Nonetheless, yes … I’m ready for it to end … but last Saturday Phil said not for 6 weeks! The blast last night was 2-3 inches … but wet and with a layer of ice on top that I could walk on! Thanks for checking in because my window for visiting is currently very tiny.
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I understand completely..finishing the last chapter of my book tomorrow.
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Good luck!!!!! … and wish I was packing my last box tomorrow! 😉
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You’ll get there!
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The James Taylor headline is priceless. And oh by the way….the Bengals should be loading up on D, even if they don’t need to. Defense is back, it seems.
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Cayman,
If one is available, I see a CB as their first pick. Besides, I’m not convinced Dre Kirkpatrick will ever be more than the 5th DB. They may go for a DE.
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Load up on D and you guys have as good a shot at the big game as any team.
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Just did a quick check on 3 mock drafts … 2 have a DE, 1 an OT. All make sense.
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Happy shopping. I know Miami’s most pressing need is shoring up that sieve of an OL. They like the kid from ND, name escapes me. It’s a start. We need to keep Tannehill upright.
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Any QB is better when they have time and smart receivers.
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I had no idea the orca was nude… that’s not why I was staring and taking pictures, honest!
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Trent,
Likely excuse!
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How am I supposed to explain this to the kids?
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That’s not my problem.
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Damn whales… such exhibitionists.
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No problem … well, as long as they aren’t on my street.
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In a stream of consciousness I’m crying UNCLE too today because of the snow And wore myself out this afternoon shoveling the stuff out of our driveway and a neighbor’s (you know them) Also dealing with the schools closed and not being able to take care of business there And wondering why the snow plows didn’t get to our street until 5:00 pm today Also went skiing last week with a relative-in-law (you know him) and found Perfect North ABUZZ about their hometown Olympic Hero Nick Goepper And hope to see the artist’s work you talked about today And hope to work it out to see a UC basketball game this season And wish you well on your move.
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Tim,
That stuff was horrible to shovel … horrible! … so I did what I thought was reasonable on me. Cheers to your neighborly efforts! Hope you make it to see this artist’s work because I think her style fits well with what you like.
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“Store manager impressed by new trainee’s ability to ignore customers”–I think i’ve met some of these people. I can’t possibly do a better job, or even come close, to yours, Frank. That’s a record number of words. 🙂 I hope you enjoyed Nutella day!
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Debra,
My combo was simply one of those that kept building each time I looked at it. Meanwhile, the Nutella and marshmallow creme sandwich was a good one!
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Nude Congressman forces woman to ignore mystery meals.
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Jim,
… and to go off of Carrie’s idea … and then tweets a selfie.
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😆 😆 😆
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I think you’ve got the winner this week again, but mine might actually be true 🙂
Breaking News: unaware Congressman with ponytail at Sea somewhere in container smoking e-cigarette
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Fasab,
That will work … so here’s a spinoff …. Congressman Unaware
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Yep, pity it hadn’t been plural 😉
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How true!
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Your storm, please take it back! It snowed (and iced) in Dallas. Uncle! I don’t do winter well.
I have nothing, yours is to good. Yes, I am late but I have had a visitor all week and so now am catching up with a weeks worth of reading.
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Val,
Oh no … more ice and snow in Dallas is not a good thing. Then again, I know that you scream “Uncle!” after one day below 50. Hope all went with the visit!
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