On Satire Bits: Vol. 98

Happy Hump Day to all!

Cincinnati is getting spotting rain for a few days, but we got the golf in. Yep, I played with the blurry eye. How’s your weather?

EyeballCloseUpThe eye drama continues. This morning I went to an ophthalmologist specializing in the retina. After some tests with some interesting equipment to get images of my retina, the conclusive diagnosis is an occlusion of the central retinal vein – a blockage in the main vein leaving the retina, which consequently slows down the flow of oxygen and nutrients to the demanding cells of the retina. No medication, but my wife and I have a decision to make in upcoming weeks about the next test. Meanwhile, we wait, plus I will meet with my primary physician next week for her perspective.

Life: The Musical is up next with Act 5 featuring Dreams … so song titles must include dream(s), dreamer, dreaming, or compound words with dream. Curtain time is Wednesday at 9:30 pm (Eastern US).

On to the midweek dose of satire courtesy of The Onion. Any favorites? As always, for those desiring an extra challenge, use the words in the headlines below to create your own combo. Mine is at the end.

Embed from Getty Images

Male gaze falls upon Buffalo chicken bites

Everyone in Sears spanking a child

Dad way scarier when controlling temper

American Medical Association changes stance on self-immolation

Taco Bell warns employees against directly exposing skin to food

Working artist has developed thick skin for sound career advice

New study finds employee morale drastically improves after watching co-worker throw fit

Single most replaceable person in company will walk if he doesn’t’ get raise

Man holding giant turkey leg never been more captivating in entire life

Everyone on wedding dance floor simultaneously wonder if they’re truly happy

My Combo: Giant turkey falls upon chicken to change employee morale at Taco Bell