On Satire Bits: Vol. 107

Heeeeee Haw …. it’s the first mid-week dose of satire since returning from the blogging break!

Hope your week has gone well so far. Something odd happened to me on Monday. I was out and about during lunch, so thought I’d stop by Taco Bell for something fast. After ordering two items and a small drink, the clerk asked for $2.58 while handing me a small cup for my drink. Quick math told me that wasn’t right, but I obliged … then looked at the bill to see “Senior Drink $0.00”.

Cincinnati weather has been fabulous of late, which is great because our golf league is one of the few still playing. Both my partner and I played well Tuesday, so it will be interesting to see the standings going into next week’s finale.

Below the image is your dose of mid-week satire to deliver a mid-week boost toward the weekend. Which is your favorite? For that extra challenge, make your original headline by using the words below to make a new combination. It’s easy … focus on the nouns and verbs to get you started. My combo is at the end. Have a good rest of the week.

NASA announces plans to launch a chimpanzee to the Sun

Police department reduces cost by using same evidence for every investigation

Man confused by compliment from person whose career he can’t help

Person who will embalm you walking around out there

Voters clamoring to know if female political candidate a mother first

Man concerned he spread himself too thin between eating sandwich, watching television

Man in elevator in on conversation now

Man’s anxiety not about to let depression muscle in on turf

Area man knows exactly which relatives would be problem if he ever came into money

Roommates still don’t know each well enough to not speak

My Combo: Chimp plans to embalm political candidate who plans to launch mother in elevator to reduce costs

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49 thoughts on “On Satire Bits: Vol. 107

    • Hudson,
      I’ve been asked about Senior Rates at golf courses and where I get my haircut, and to be honest, it doesn’t bother me. On the other hand, when I told my wife the Taco Bell story, she laughed and cheered.

      Like

  1. “Man confused by female walking around eating sandwich, watching television about to muscle in on conversation to launch a chimpanzee political candidate” … missed the Wednesday fun…

    Like

  2. My favorite Satire Bit was “Area man knows exactly which relatives would be a problem if he ever came into money” because average folks need think about the problems of joining the 1%.
    I also liked “Voters clamoring to know if female political candidate a mother first” because it reminded me of my favorite bumper sticker from my trip yesterday to Yellow Springs, OH, “Can we vote on YOUR marriage too?”

    Also glad to hear that you got a $0.00 senior drink. Mark down that you’ll get another perk next Wed., Oct 1, at 9:40 am, with the senior rate at Stonelick Hills GC, in Batavia, OH.

    Like

    • Lorna,
      Welcome first-time commenter … and I must say, you made me laugh. I am tempted to mettle with your mind, but I shall resist the temptation. Because I’m not sure were your location, The Onion is a wonderful site for satire in the USA, so I selectively collect their headlines to feature here on Wednesdays …. and a few also appear on Friday’s Opinions in the Shorts.

      Like

  3. I love your combo, Frank!!!!
    NASA plans to launch a political candidate to the Sun whose career between eating sandwich, watching television spread depression to police department.
    Honestly, “Senior Drink”?!!!!!!!!

    Like

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