On Satire Bits: Vol. 119

Cheers to 2015’s first Wednesday!

How is your week so far? Cincinnati has received a blast of winter, but it’s affecting many in the US. Nonetheless, it’s nothing like last winter!

Time for a test … Do you remember the key words for the week?

Life: The Musical is the next post with Act 15 featuring songs with old, older, oldest, elderly, or aging in the title. Act 15 starts Wednesday, 9:30 pm (Eastern US). Two Cautions: 1) “Getting Old” is the theme, so titles as 12 Year Old Boy would be deemed unacceptable because the boy isn’t old. 2) My Old Kentucky Home is unacceptable because I hate the University of Kentucky.

On to your mid-week dose of satire from The Onion. Which is your favorite? Plus, it’s time for the 2015’s first attempt at the Combination Challenge. For any newbies, from the words (and only those words) in The Onion headlines below the image, create your own, very original headline. My combo is at the end.

Has anyone ridden in a car like these two people? Have a good rest of the week.

Embed from Getty Images

Poll: 80% of Americans would get in vehicle with stranger for chance at new life

Genetics emphatically deny playing any part in area man’s body

Researchers: Quality of sleep may be affected by abandoning family in 1994

Coworkers putting in Herculean effort to sustain conversation for entire commute

Pastor always knew agnostic would come crawling back to church for wedding

Man has only self to blame for what’s in targeted banner

Moronic mailroom worker worked way down from CEO

Hero of the Common Man talks to plumber for entire time while in house

Area mom raving about Phoenix airport

Responsible man sets aside small portion of every paycheck for bank to gamble

Man realizes he’s the only one of college friends falling out of touch

My Combo: Agnostic pastor raving about responsible man abandoning family for moronic hero