Hey there? How’s your week going?
Mine has been OK to this point with some errands, visits, phone calls, etc. I cram those into the first part of the week because my part-time job occupies the end of the week. It’s another week without a golf league – but the season is early, so I’m hopeful that some opportunities will become available.
Several times I’ve mentioned that my wife and I are in a Quickstep formation at a local studio. So far, it has been quite the torture for numerous reasons, but we’re trying. Many readers probably do not know much about the dance, so the next post will be about Quickstep.
On to the mid-week satire from The Onion with hopes of delivering a chuckle. Don’t forget the Combo Challenge, which gives you a chance to make your own satirical headline. All you have to do is limit yourself to the world that are in the headlines below the picture. My Combo is at the end.
Any favorites? Have a good rest of the week.
Embed from Getty ImagesScout returns with news from quicker checkout line to the east
Study finds employees most productive they set their own salaries
Area man could have made same meal at home but worse
US Government offers 100 million Americans generous severance deal to leave country
Report: Reuben rated top mid-size sandwich in its class
Woman’s parents accepting of mixed-attractiveness relationship
Report: Mom has plans for tub of whipped cream in fridge – don’t eat it!
Area man only one with problems
Man looks on helplessly as friend tells him story he’s already heard
Mankind tired of having to remind itself of good in the world
Condo board maintains purity of bloodline through generations of intermarriage
My Combo: Rueben looks helplessly at woman’s generous offer to eat whipped cream from mid-size area on man
Scout returns with tub of whipped cream reminding himself of good in the world. I mean, what could be better than a tub of whipped cream?
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Cathy,
Great point …. a spoon, a tub of Cool Whip … .a few sprinkles … Merit Badge in order.
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Whipped cream sandwich rated top meal in US Government study.
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Cynthia,
Possibly only topped if someone found a way to enclose whipped cream into batter for deep frying.
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The Scots probably have done that. They’ve deep-fried everything else.
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Good point … Love live the Scots!
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It’s hard to get past the whipped cream,
“Study finds generations of Americans have made whipped cream sandwich in their own home”
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Fasab,
Of course, we both know that’s a big DUH because we didn’t need a government study to tell us something we already knew. 🙂
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I like your combo….
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Bulldog,
Well thank you kind sir.
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Mom maintains mixed attractiveness good in the relationship world through generations of intermarriage.
I’ve been suffering with blocked ears for ten days and finally caved today and sought professional help. International travel not good for ears!!
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Pauline,
Cheers to mom! Bummer that the ears are clogged …. probably due to too much partying with this crazy American women.
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Chuckling … I like – Man looks on helplessly as friend tells him story he’s already heard –
unfortunately, I have a friend – she’s in her late 80’s – she tends to tell me stories I’ve heard a gazillion times. I don’t have the heart to tell her. 😳 It’s kinda sad but she’s a sweetheart otherwise.
Have a Great Day aFrank !!! 😎
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Isadora,
Given that she’s a sweetheart, yep – cheers to you for keeping her smiling.
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No face hitters among the Onions today, but “Scout returns with news from quicker checkout line to the east” produced a slight breeze.
After watching the Quickstep Dance video I sent you, I’m thinking the devil is in the details of that one (quick) step.
As a man also without a golf league, tomorrow I start my new life as an itinerant golf league sub.
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Tim,
Regarding Quickstep, their are different styles/versions, thus tomorrow will counter the video you sent.
In terms of the Thursday golf, I may be able to occasionally join, but not until June.
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Itinerant Golf League Substitutes live a shadowy existence in which they cannot join, win prizes, or permanently have their name listed on the scorecard. They live only to post a score in place of the absent league member, which will then be factored into the league’s final tally at the end of the season.
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Yep – been there, done that … but better than the option of not playing.
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Brilliant combo, Frank! My laconic contribution: Mankind helplessly plans for checkout… 😉
Happy Hump Day! 🙂
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Marina,
Ouch – then again, human nature seems to look at the negative more than the positive … so it fits! … and thanks!
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🙂
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“US Government plans for 100 million employees in the country to have whipped cream.”—Oh, pick me, pick me! It will go with my cherry cheesecake.
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Carrie,
Feds subsidizing whipped cream is fine with me as long as I get some to but on my cheesecake.
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I enjoyed a Reuben yesterday, and gosh was it delicious. I even ate the entire sandwich, something I rarely do do.
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Catherine,
It seems the Reuben was the right sandwich for you today … and congrats on the Clean Plate Award.
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Report: US Government plans to leave the country.
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Lorna,
Wow … gotta not only love it, but cheer for it happening. Then again, then what?
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I know the Quickstep can be difficult because your feet need to move fast. I know you might be frustrated Frank, but I have faith you will accomplish the dance :).
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Kay,
Thanks … and the Quickstep post goes live in about 15 minutes.
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Scout finds area Americans helplessly accepting the world condo problems
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John,
Oh no … the world condo problems? … and we moved into one a year ago!
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This one was for you.
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A chuckle has been delivered. I am very interested in this Quickstep.
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Ocean,
Woo hoo … a mid-week chuckle is an important boost to propel one toward the weekend. … and the Quickstep post is in 10 minutes. …. BTW … my wife and I like ballroom dance as a hobby.
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I think it is lovely that you both share such a vibrant hobby. Am getting ready to read your Quickstep post as I type (mug of tea in hand!).
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Ocean,
A vibrant hobby it is. For us, it’s about the fun, exercise, and people … not about performing and competing. For other ballroom posts, see my sidebar.
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Man looks on helplessly as Scout returns with problems.
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Elyse,
Ouch … after all, we count on scouts!
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Yours is the best, Frank! I can’t top that. 🙂 I like it better than the originals!
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Debra,
Well thank you … and it is one the gives a little room for interpretation.
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Nope, again I have nothing! Looking forward to hearing about the quickstep though – it always looks rather tricky on Strictly Come Dancing! (Which is our equivalent of Dancing with the Stars).
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Vanessa,
Strictly Come Dancing is what started it all! I actually like watching some of the videos from that show because they focus on the dance, and less glitzy than our show.
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My creative imagination has flown out the window this morning, I have nothing. My favorite though is your combination, very nice. Hmmmm.
Can’t wait to hear about quickstep and am hoping it is accompanied by video!
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Val,
Slow-firing neurons in the early morning is understandable. Meanwhile, the Quickstep post is up .. .and includes multiple videos.
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I have it up next to read! Trying hard to once again catch up just a little bit as I am working my first week of a new contract (and loving it).
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Hooray on the new contract!
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Endless challenges here. Trying to catch up – what a week. The German arrived with crummy tummy (running every test under the sun except scope, waiting for results) and Molly, we almost lost her this morning (today’s post up now). So the grins from your posts are very much welcomed and cheery. Thanks
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Mouse,
Just read the post. Positive thoughts to Molly and owners. Thanks for letting me know.
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