On Satire Bits: Vol. 133

Greetings from San Diego … oops … I mean Cincinnati … but our current weather is fabulous! I spent the day on the golf course, but the weather and company was better than the golf. Oh well, that’s the way the game is.

Thanks for the positive reaction about the previous post about Martha. I enjoyed putting that one together, and the variety of emotions surprised me. As I mentioned to some in the comments, my intent was around a tribute – not sadness. Nonetheless, I’m glad to know that some were touched by the post.

Below the image are the headlines from The Onion for your mid-week bump in satire. Any favorites? Don’t forget the Combo Challenge by making your own headline from the words in the headlines below. My Combo is at the end. Have a good rest of the week.

Embed from Getty Images

Mother still searching for pre-school that focuses exclusively on her son

Email from Mom sent at 5:32 am

Man now too exhausted to repress both anger and sadness

Majority of Americans never use Physical Education after high school

Night of uninterrupted deep sleep really throws man’s day off

Breakthrough procedure allows parents to select sexiness of child

Trip to bar gives friends opportunity to sit around, do nothing in different place

Avoiding popular songs somehow accomplishment for local man

Study: Majority of frontal lobe occupied by thoughts of sausage links

Man on gurney has brief word with protagonist before entering ambulance

Apartment manager already knows to look out for tenant sending Minnie Mouse checks

Hollywood quietly shuts down after realizing entertainment a delicate matter of subjective opinion

My Combo: Man on gurney exhausted after searching for uninterrupted sausage links

46 thoughts on “On Satire Bits: Vol. 133

  1. Night of uninterrupted deep sleep throws email from mom sent at 5:32 am. Glad to hear you had a chance to visit San Diego. Oops, I mean glad you have some fabulous weather. I’m sure that helps you feel better about your golf score. Who cares, right? Enjoy!

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  2. Man now too exhausted by thoughts of sausage links, a delicate matter of subjective opinion. Weather has been wonderful here as well! Planning on a little golf myself over the weekend 🙂

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  3. I think we’re supposed to get some nice weather here, too. We’ve had some warm and humid days, but fortunately my husband’s golf tournaments were not delayed or rained out. (He coaches high school golf–his last year doing it.)

    “Study: Majority of frontal lobe occupied by Avoiding popular songs”

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  4. No face washings from today’s Onions.

    I’m in total agreement on the delightful golfing weather and company yesterday.

    Any advice on how I can improve my short game?

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    • Val,
      Believe me …golfers want to play well – but on this day, the television cameras wouldn’t have gotten much footage for the sports highlights.

      Because subjective opinion is delicate matter for the frontal lobe, I wonder about non-subjective opinions.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Debra,
      Weather is more of the same today … that will be 3 in a row … and a tad cooler than San Diego! … but delightful. Meanwhile, i would like a crystal ball to see what sausage the last survivor of the friends group will select.

      Like

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