On Satire Bits: Vol. 112

Hey hey hey … How’s your week going? Do you need a dose of mid-week satire as an energy boost? If so .. hold that thought for a few important tidbits.

Life: The Musical starts Wednesday 9:30 pm (Eastern US) with Act 11 featuring Hope, so song titles must include Hope, Hopes, Hoped, Hoping, Hopeless, or Hopelessly in the title. Have you made your selection? Shhhhhh …. don’t tell anyone!

Because Halloween is Friday, The Onion offers these tips for the perfect Halloween party.

The 200,000 hit may happen with this post. Because I doubt it, my guess is during Life: The Musical (Act 11). … but heck, maybe during Opinions in the Shorts.  Whenever, my way of celebrating the occasion is to dive into The Onion’s archives searching for celebration headlines. Which is your favorite?

For those who want to write an original combo, go ahead .. but I struggled because of the nouns and similar verbs. Nonetheless, have a good rest of the week.

Local couple celebrates anniversary by returning to website where they met

Chessmaster begins celebration several moves before checkmate

Parents at graduation celebrate child’s last accomplishment

Painful reminder celebrates fourth birthday

Larva celebrates ascent into adulthood with Bar-Moltzvah

Christianity celebrates one billionth unanswered prayer

White Castle bathroom stall celebrates fifth conception

Canvas shopping bag celebrates third year on doorknob

New hospital celebrates grand opening with free health-insurance samples

Team celebrates eighth straight loss by emptying garbage can contents on coach

Tiger Woods adds celebration where he slowing licks a putter shaft

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46 thoughts on “On Satire Bits: Vol. 112

  1. Local couple celebrates anniversary by emptying garbage can contents on Tiger Woods….. not easy this week Frank to come up with much more than this…. but maybe Tiger will get renewed energy from this….

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    • Mary,
      Many thanks for the update. Unfortunately, I had to be out for about 3 hours, so I missed the rollover … because I now know it happened sometime between this comment and the next one, I will put this in two places. … 🙂

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        • Thanks … More of a sign of longevity as this place isn’t one where readers flock to in droves … then again, that was never my goal. Meanwhile, also approaching a comments milestone. At least that one I can determine who hits it … well, as long as I’m awake.

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    • Lorna,
      That one is absolutely quintessential Onion. Meanwhile, since the celebration time occurred sometime between your comment and the previous one … I’m inserting a pair of celebratory bookends. … 🙂

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        • The videos is simply copy & paste. If you paste it after the last punctuation (and space) the just the URL appears. However, after the last punctuation, then you Enter (to go to the next line, or Enter twice …. the video will embed (be visible) in the post.

          In terms of pictures, I think it could be done by Replying to the comment on the Comments page of your Dashboard … but I’m not definitely sure.

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  2. Tough one indeed, too many celebrations perhaps. Anyway here’s another one:
    “coach celebrates bathroom stall grand opening by emptying contents on Tiger Woods “

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  3. You made it with this one I see, scanning the comments. Congratulations. The Onion is always good for a rift, I think though I will just say I got nothing, not a thing. I will just continue down the path of catch up.

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