Month: May 2014

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Opinions in the Shorts: Vol. 220

On Politics
Is there a difference between a politician rebranding, repositioning, or evolving for personal gain and lying?

As the Benghazi beat goes on, I ponder this question: White House spin and Republican conspiracy theories? After all, both ways produce misinformation.

The kidnapping of the Nigerian girls is sad and pathetic. However, the conservative spin doctors have amazingly determined the real cause of Boko Haram’s actions – Hillary Clinton! Read it for yourself here. It’s probably safe to say that if she wasn’t a strong potential 2016 candidate for the Democrats, she wouldn’t have been blamed.

With many political pundits focusing on former Governor Jeb Bush (R-FL) as a potential GOP presidential candidate in 2016, I found this article interesting.

When it comes to caring for veterans, both parties are woefully inadequate.

On This Week’s Headlines from The Onion

  • Stone-hearted ice witch forgoes exclamation point
  • Study: Seeing Jesus in toast is perfectly normal
  • Pharmaceutical industry reeling as more mom’s making vaccines at home
  • Opposing team terrified after seeing home fans all wearing same color t-shirt
  • Budget woes force Heaven to reduce eternal life to 500 billion years
  • Report: Growing number of Americans forced to make ends meet by collaborating on song with Pitbull

Bonus Tips from The Onion

Interesting Reads

On Potpourri
The coal mining accident in Turkey is horrible. Peace and strength to all involved and affected.

Multiple US cities are hosting the Great American Beer Run, in which participates get a pint of craft beer every half mile (800 meters). The event’s FAQ page is a good one.

Running events are common fundraisers. In Cincinnati last weekend one charity effort involved running .05K …. that’s 164 feet (50 meters).

Wow – the dedication of the 9/11 Memorial Museum was quite moving.

The current season of Dancing with the Stars is nearing an end. Overall, the dancing has been very good. As in past years, viewer voting did something stupid. How and the heck could Charlie White get the lowest number of votes?

Life: The Musical returns next week, so I will announce the Act 4 theme on the next edition of Monday Morning Entertainment.

Time has worked against me this week, so no Saturday Morning Cartoon Classic post this weekend.

Your weekend celebrations

  • (Fri) Bats Day, Biographer’s Day, Endangered Species Day, Virtual Assistants Day, O. Henry Pun-Off Day, NASCAR Day, Bike to Work Day, Pizza Party Day, Spaghetti-Os Day, Sea Monkey Day, Pickle Day, Piercing Day, Coquilles St. Jacques Day
  • (Sat) Mike: the Headless Chicken Day, Armed Forces Day, Morel Mushroom Day, Merry-Go-Round Day, Rat Pack Day, Hypertension Day, Turn Beauty Inside Out Day, Information Society Day, Telecommunications Day, Neurofibromatosis Day, Cherry Cobbler Day
  • (Sun) I Love Reeses Day, Museum Day, HIV Vaccine Awareness Day, Mother Whistler Day, Neighbor Day, Visit Your Relatives Day, Cheese Souffle Day, No Dirty Dishes Day

To send you into the weekend, let’s travel back to 1965 when. Dominigo Zamudio had the first Billboard Number One Record of the Year that never made it to #1 on any week – a feat that stood alone for 35 years. Dominigo Zamudio? Yep – he’s also known as Sam. Have a safe weekend and in the words of Garrison Keillor, Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

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On Satire Bits: Vol. 94

Has your week started well? I hope so. I’ve been keeping busy, but hope normalcy (whatever it is) returns soon. Because reciprocating is important to me, my apologies for being away from reading your blogs. Just want you to know that I’m going through a busy period.

Thanks for all the wonderful comments on my belated Mother’s Day post. My emotions got to me more reading your comments on Tuesday more than thinking about it on Sunday.

With Wednesday being Marshmallow Fluff Day, seems that would be a perfect day for a fluffernutter. For those needing to know more, here’s the recipe for the AFA Deluxe Fluffernutter.

Let’s more on to your mid-week dose of satire. As long time readers know, for those desiring an extra challenge with a twist of fun, rearrange the words from the headlines below to create your own satirical headline. “My combo” is at the end. Have a good rest of the week!

New app matches you to others in vicinity who wasted $2.99 on same app

Dad announces plan to honk when he’s out front

Newly discovered cave paintings suggest early man was battling a lot of inner demons

New employee still eager enough to pick up slack for co-workers

Area man cleans apartment once every relationship

Man attempting to determine whether restaurant closed without getting too close

Barbed wire industry protests negative portrayal in “Evil Within” video game

Bartender doesn’t mind taking picture with you and your friends

Movie-goer sneaks candy past teen worker earning $7 per hour

Report: Average American consuming 4 ounces of cheese right now

My Combo: Industry announces new video game with area dad battling average bartender in cave for $2.99 cheese

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On a Belated Tribute

Mother’s Day was this past weekend. Although time didn’t work in my favor to get a post together, mothers aren’t forgotten.

This is my mother. She learned her English by exposure, thus everyone noticed her Italian accent. Her strength was her kindness and her hands … that is, she could cook and sew with the best of them.

My Mother with her Tuscan hometown in the background

My Mother with her Tuscan hometown in the background

My mother died much too young … a month shy of her 59th birthday back in 1987. However, I was lucky to have someone else.

This is my mother-in-law (MIL).  Like my mother, she grew up during the depression, thus those times influenced her. Like my mother, my MIL was genuinely kind and cared about people … and always supportive of my wife and I. She and my mother were very close to the same age, but she lived much longer.

My mother-in-law - a kind, generous, and genuine person

My mother-in-law: a kind, generous, and genuine person

My MIL passed away this past December, so this past Sunday was new to me as it was the first Mother’s Day I exclusively relied on memories.

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On a Monday

Warm weather was upon Cincinnati this weekend. What was the weather like in your part of the world? Tell us about your weekend.

As with most weekends, ours was filled with a variety. From ballroom dance to attending our first Reds baseball game of the season … from organizing our recent mess to planting new plants … from attending a birthday party to playing handbells. Yep .. we stayed busy.

Knowing that some of my readers enjoying hearing the handbell pieces we play, click here for Fantasy on Terra Beata, which is interesting and we received kind words from numerous attendees.

Celebrations for your week

  • (Week) American Craft Beer Week, Police Week, Food Allergy Awareness Week, Nursing Home Week, Hospital Week, Return to Work Week, Transportation Week, Women’s Health Week, Reading is Fun Week, Children Book Week, Salute to Moms Over 35 Week, Bike to Work Week, Dog Bite Prevention Week, Neuropathy Awareness Week, Stuttering Awareness Week, Pet Week, Music Week, Etiquette Week, Historic Preservation Week
  • (Mon) Limerick Day, Nutty Fudge Day, Odometer Day, Women’s Check-up Day
  • (Tues) Frog Jumping Day, Hug Your Cat Day, Cough Drop Day, Leprechaun Day, Blame Someone Else Day, Apple Pie Day, Fruit Cocktail Day
  • (Wed) Donate a Day’s Wages to Charity Day, Chicken Dance Day, Night-shirt/Third-Shift Workers Day, Crazy Day, Stars and Stripes Forever Day, Marshmallow Fluff Day, Buttermilk Biscuit Day
  • (Thurs) Brown Bag Thursday, Over the Rainbow Day, Straw Hat Day, Dinosaur Day, Nylon Stockings Day, Tuberous Sclerosis Day, Chocolate Chip Day, MPS Awareness Day, Day of Families, Hyperemisis Gravidarum Awareness Day

With this weekend includes Hug Your Cat Day, that reminds me of  this funny video that I’ve used before. Enjoy … and have a good week.

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Opinions in the Shorts: Vol. 219

On Politics
When are public figures going to learn that references to the Holocaust, Hitler, or 9-11 seldom are effective. Here’s the latest: “Democrats bragging about the number of mandatory sign ups for Obamacare is like Germans bragging about the number of mandatory sign ups for ‘train rides’ for Jews in the 40s.” (Stacey Campfield State Senator, (R-Tennessee). And then in a follow-up phone interview, he stood by his comments and wasn’t concerned about criticisms – but has since apologized. I yield to these words of a great American orator.

Las Vegas hosts the most conventions in the US (over 22,000 in 2013). Interestingly, neither of the major political parties have ever chosen the glamour and lights of the desert to host their convention – but 2016 could be different because Las Vegas is on the Republican shortlist of six finalists.

This past Tuesday was Primary Day in Ohio. I proudly proclaim that I am not longer a registered Republican. Because I wouldn’t declare as a Democrat, this means I received an “issues-only” ballot.

The US is divided into 435 Congressional districts, with each district electing a representative every two years. I can’t recall the source (but it is reputable), but only 7 districts have toss-up elections this fall. Surely this has nothing to do with gridlock in Washington.

On This Week’s Headlines from The Onion

  • Tree outside window upset man changed channel
  • Poll: 56% of voters say country better than it was 4 eons ago
  • Picasso’s “Guernica” triples in value after being autographed by the 1994 New York Rangers
  • Donald Sterling just glad tape recorder batteries died
  • National jeweler recalls 2 million cursed wedding rings

Onion Extras
Pros and cons of homeschooling
Pros and cons of gun control
Reasons for and against capital punishment

Interesting Reads
Alan Shepherd’s first space flight
A conservative economist about the tax reform vacuum
Bonds infographic
Interesting collection of black & white nature images from National Geographic
About journalist Lara Logan
How eyes sense motion

On Potpourri
Earlier this week I posted images of some of Cincinnati’s companies. I took them while walking the streets during the Opening Day festivities. I forgot one major company … and I even walked into their building that day. E.W. Scripps Company is a major media company operating newspapers and television stations throughout the country. You may be familiar with Scripps as the sponsors of the National Spelling Bee. Plus, in 2007, Scripps split separated into two company with Scripps Network Interactive (based in Nashville) … and many of you know their cable television stations as Food Network, Travel Channel, DIY Network, Home & Garden Television (HGTV), and Cooking Channel.

Time has worked against me this week, so no Saturday Morning Cartoon Classic post this weekend.

Here are your weekend celebrations

  • (Fri) Tear the Tags Off the Mattress Day, Moscato Day, Lost Sock Memorial Day, Military Spouse Appreciation Day, Hooray for Buttons Day, Fintastic Friday (Give Sharks a Voice), Peter Pan Day, Butterscotch Brownies Day
  • (Sat) Birthmother’s Day, Belly Dance Day, Train Day, Chinese Language Day, Clean Your Room Day, Cornelia de Lange Syndrome Awareness Day, Trust Your Intuition Day, Fair Trade Day, Mother Ocean Day, Babysitters Day, Miniature Golf Day, Lupus Day, Windmill Day, Astronomy Day, Shrimp Day, Stay Up All Night Day, Military-Amaetur Crossband Communications Day
  • (Sun) Mother’s Day, Eat What You Want Day, Hostess Cupcake Day, Mocha Torte Day, Fibromyalgia & Chronic Fatigue Awareness Day, Root Canal Appreciation Day

To send you into the weekend, here’s a 1973 hit by Deely Stan Steely Dan. Enjoy, Reelin’ in the Years. Have a safe weekend and in the words of Garrison Keillor, Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.